Psychedelic musings

Dads of Girls

2012-01-11T18:15:00.003+05:30

Am father of a 14 month old girl. Having been the father of a boy until now, baby girls did not need to be planned for handling. They seemed like belonging to another planet. Until she came into my life.

Found this beautiful blogpost by another Dad of another girl. Who puts it very well indeed.

http://www.fromdatestodiapers.com/50-rules-for-dads-of-daughters

School Sports Day - Jan 2012

2012-01-07T15:31:00.014+05:30

The tanned look of my son. Explained by the weeks of preparation for the Hula-Hoop item as part of the school's Sports Day on Jan 7th, 2012. He is in Class 4.

As part of the attire for the event, Chinmay had to have a sweat band ( headband like what McEnroe sported in the goodl old days at Wimbledon). It was to be in black color. On the last evening before the event, his brave father set out on the hunt for this sweat band. Be that as it may, the band was not available in Black at the Sports Goods stores. The Dad called back home to tell Chinmay that Black is not available. Would it be fine to go in for a white color or Light Blue colored Band instead. Chinmay rejected the proposition. Asked his Dad to continue to look for it in Black.

Dad gave up the chase and came home with a white colored band...

The day dawned. Black color not available.

Chinmay's mom came on to perform the rescue act!

Lo and behold....White turned Black!

She stitched a black colored cloth over the white band !!

It all happened in a photo finish before he had to leave home for the event....

After this, the oft used motivational quote could be amended to say "Where there is a Will, White can be turned to Black!"

( no pun intended)

Just Another Day in a Startup's Office

2011-12-29T12:41:00.009+05:30

"No Sir! We do not supply to Karachi." the lady at the other end of the line said. She sounded a tad puzzled.

"But whaay? I want delivery in Karachi.I will pay big amount. No praaablem. I like GiftBig.com. You say,I pay.I have big money" I queried. The Koramangala traffic in Bangalore was adding to the din. Coming from outside my cabin.

"Not now sir. Happy Diwali Sir". She replied.

" Diwali?what is Diwali? Is it a new special sweet dish ?" I grumbled back.

"Ooops Sorry Sir. I did not think. Diwali is not a dish sir . This is a festival in India. I automatically wished you because I was thinking you are also in India". Ritika harriedly said.

" Same same for you wishes also. I want delivery of Gift Cards for my family please." I told her.

"But sir, we are not sending to Karachi".

" See madam, my family is big family. I want for my first wife; my second wife, my third wife, and special gift card for my fourth new nikaaah wife. You see, my old wives should be happy when my new wife comes home next week. ".

Ritika was getting confused. " Yes sir."

" So you agree now. You tell me which Gift Card in GiftBig.com will make my older three wives happy. I will make payment in full amount now"

Ritika sounded rattled now " Sir, how can I select for your wife. I mean all your wives? I dont know them. But then, we dont even supply to Karachi".

" Madam, you are not understanding my big problem. My nikaah is tomorrow. She is very beautiful. She is nineteen years old. My other wives should be busy and happy. They should not think I dont love them now. Only you can help me"

" Yes Sir."

" See see.I am big man.I can love all my wives together. same same. They are mothers of all my children. Which man does not like his children's mothers? "

"Correct Sir"

"You see, I want to take new wife to Dubai for honeymoon.Then, old wives should not feel bad. They can do shopping when I am away for honeymoon". The Patthani voice said.

"Please wait sir. Can you please hold the line . Let me check back". The Lady replied. More sure of herself now.

"Please. I like you.I like your product. Karachi is nice place. Lot of business for you.Please send my orders soon and I will pay anything". I replied. I pleaded. I growled. As a harried Pathan customer .

Toooon Toooon. Tooooon. Toooon. The line was holding. For 20 seconds. Timed it with my Blackberry.

Ritika came back on the line and told me that they could not deliver to Karachi as their e-commerce delivery services were limited to Indian borders only.

I groaned and grumbled. Then profusely thanked Ritika and got off the line.

Ritika had just joined us recently in the ecommerce development team. She had come in from a leading multinational firm. In the interview rounds, she said that she was interested in having a direct customer interface and to handle the customer side of the business. She was getting bored with years of managing coding and project deadlines for American corporate customers she did not even know. She was keen on working in a smaller firm. Her educational credentials were quite impeccable. She was a Technology Lead with a team of 5 members.

From such a large organisational setup to the vagaries of a startup would be quite a move.

I had dissuaded her. Told her that she was mad to consider such a move. That her parents would cry at her craziness. That her neighbours would smirk at her.

But she had still insisted. And joined.

She had also settled down fairly quickly.

I hopped across to her workstation. Asked how things were. If online orders were pouring or trickling in. I nonchalantly suggested that we should find a way to deliver to Karachi and Kandahar too.

She got up. Impressed. Baffled. Stumped. Looked in awe at me. Like I was a prophet with clairvoyant skills.

"Yes sure. Business seems to be booming in Karachi...just got a call now too" She told me.

I smiled back at her. Told her to just chill and relax. Told her that the mystery caller was standing right in front of her. She did not understand.

Told her that the Karachi caller had called just to see how she responded to unexpected circumstances that could crop up from out of the blue!

Welcome aboard Ritika!

Sabarimala 2011

2011-12-10T23:16:00.003+05:30

This Blog platform has not received my needed attention...not that there was not much to comment about in my environs.

The last few weeks were not exactly uneventful! This phase saw me head out on a pilgrimage Trip to Sabarimala with my son, Chinmay; a trip with office staff to Rotti Kallu, a resort tucked away in the Western Ghats; a fractured little finger on the right hand - my first foray into the arena of fractured bones!

Chinmay was going for the first time ie Kannisaamy. The pilgrimage trip was decided just about 3-4 days before the actual trip. Thanks to a resident from our complex, Jaikrishnan.

Chinmay had company from 2 other children from our complex - KrishnaPriya and Kesu. Chinmay was able to do the climb quite easily, thanx to the blessings of the Almighty.

Kettunarra was done at Ayyappa temple in HSR Layout, in the presence of Dad, Uma and Devika. Took the train from Krishnarajapuram on wednesday night to Tiruvalla station.

A taxi from Tiruvalla to Pamba after a good lunch at a fellow pilgrim's house in Chengannur.

We climbed the hills at 7.30pm and were able to reach the Sannidhanam at 9.30 pm on Thursday night. Got to the padhinettambadi around 10.45pm and got to Darshan at 11.05pm. The temple closed for the night within 10minutes of our darshan. Thank God for this as the kids were quite tired and getting restive.

After an hour's rest, we descended in the night at 1.30 am on friday morn. Reached Pamba around 3.30 am.

Took the taxi to Chengannur station; boarded the Venad Express to Tripunithura Station on Friday morning.

Spent Friday at Tripunithura - got to see the cataract recovered MIL with Chinmay. Luckily got to see the Tripunithura Ulsavam splendour for a few hours as this was going on the same week.

Chinmay and I took the day train from Ernakulam on saturday morning.

Reached Home in Bangalore by Saturday 10pm.

Glad that this trip was able to be done smoothly without any long term planning from my side.

2011-11-21T22:41:00.003+05:30

http://www.indiaretailnews.com/from-the-editors-desk

Played the role of a Guest Editor for a niche online portal. This portal is popular among business owners in the retail space across India.

My article featured the learnings from the recent business trip to London in Oct 1st week.

http://www.indiaretailnews.com/from-the-editors-desk

The giftBig.com Story

2011-11-19T08:27:00.005+05:30

An online portal focusing on new concept ventures....featured our company this week.

http://yourstory.in/2011/11/smart-gifting-solutions-with-giftbig-com-a-one-stop-destination-to-purchase-gift-cards-online/

Our e-venture giftBig.com is the B2C initiative of QwikCilver which has been pioneering the concept of Gift Cards in India, has received some positive early feedback...and has been seen as a good proposition for individuals and for corproates looking for viable options for their employee gifting needs...

Our new Facebook page ( GiftBig) is also picking up visibility with more than 15,000 fans Liking us within a month of being born...

Que Sera Sera..

Holiday with the Family

2011-10-12T23:16:00.009+05:30

This is a quick summary of our Holiday trip to the Kumaon and Siwalik Hills in September 2011.

Chinmay is 9 years old while little Devika is all of 10 months. Some folks called us ridiculously foolhardy to be riding our luck to take this little lady across such long distances. If not anything else, thisBlogpost is only to serve as a factual reminder many years later for my little kids – one of who is still an infant less than a year old! ( and ofcourse, also to serve as a good reminder to myself)- of what transpired during these days that we had a holiday break…Moreover, the dear lady of the house, my wife and my kids’ Mama is prone to throw some probing trivia quiz at me a few years later –‘ I clearly remember that we had Chopsuey for Lunch at Peppers Restaurant on Mall Road on our first day”. Such trivia only serve to prove my lack of memory for such epochal events in my life.

We set off from Bangalore on Saturday morning – Sept 24^th for Delhi. The cabbie picking us from Mantri Sarovar at the break of dawn at 5.30 to drive us to Bangalore Airport. The Indigo Airline was on time. The family – Miss Devika all of 10 months old, 9 year old Chinmay were quite relaxed during the flight.

Devika did attempt to cause some havoc on the flight, however inadvertent, with her sporadic squeals of and delight – but her Mom was upto it –and steered the aircraft to safety – much to the delight of Devika’s father, who sat in a seemingly nonchalant state. I do distinctly remember that the Dabili Burger breakfast on the morning flight was quite cloyingly sweet, eeeky, drab and was left unfinished.

Uma was quite excited to be back in Delhi after 7 years – her face aptly displaying her state of mind..

The hotel booking was done through the office of Achal, our business partner in Delhi. I had briefed him that I wanted to stay in Connaught Place. He fixed us up at Hotel Corus. I did some checking on Booking.com to confirm the existence of this Hotel beforehand.

Landed in Delhi Airport by 11am. Delhi Airport to the Hotel Corus in Connaught Place – was on a typical Dilli kee Gaadi. A re-re-repainted Maruti Omni that was the choice from the Prepaid Booth – instead of the Meru Taxis. This helped get into the Dillli Groove right away.

Hotel Corus in Block B of Inner Circle- is tucked away in a vantage location. Bang in CP. With a CCD available just outside its doorway on the first floor. It seems to be frequented by backpackers and foreigner tourists wanting to stay in the heart of Delhi. The location was nice. The Hotel was typical Dillli again.

After a quick clean up operation of the kids, we set off into CP for a walk through the inner corridors. Had lunch at a Peruvian Fast Food QSR – which had newly opened in India. Nice quick food. Then stepped into Wengers for a quick delightful dessert session. Wengers was crowded with the weekend folks clamouring to indulge their sweet tooth

We seriously explored watching a film at Odeon or Plaza in CP – but the choice of films was so poor. There was Pankaj Kapoor’s directorial debut film ( Mausam ) with his son Shahid in the main role. Practically every show was only for this film – which was quite a repellent. This put paid to our movie intentions.

In the evening, we hailed a Dillli Auto – with all the trappings of Dilli bang on. A big avuncular Sardaarji Uncle for the perfect role of driver. As expected, Sardaarji overcharged us for the drop from CP to India Gate. But we went along with this for the joy of it all. Sardaarji saw the excited state of the passengers in his vehicle and politely enquired as to which country we were from! Told him that we were travelling from Bangalore.

Sardaarji also told us that he has a grand daughter who is 6months old – in comparison to our own 10month old Devika in tow.

Sardaarji took us on a quick auto view drive past Parliament House and Rashtrapathi Bhavan. Chinmay asked his father what exactly is tne need for a Parliament and what did happen inside the precincts of this big building.

As to the Rashtrapathi Bhavan, he said that he certainly prefers to stay in his current 3 BHK house than in the Presidential mammoth house.

India Gate was a place which excited Uma more than it did the kids. Chinmay thankfully found a paper-parachute-wallah to peddle his Rupee Ten gizmo to Chinmay. This gizmo kept Chinmay busy while his Mother sat watching the India Gate lit up in its splendor for the weekend visitors and Dilli-ites.

We then realized that the baby bag was missing from the various bags that was being lugged along by us – and this bag had the medicines and change clothes. Chinmay suggested that it might be in the Hotel Room. Just to be sure, we headed back to CP to confirm if we had lost the Bag.

Thankfully, Chinmay was proved right and the Baby bag was in the Hotel Room. We headed out for Dinner – as Chinmay wanted a Delhi kind of special dinner.

Walked and walked around CP. Decided to finally have our dinner at Embassy Restaurant – an old place that served good food. Quite expensive – but worth a holiday dinner with family. Notwithstanding this, or because if the price tab, this Restaurant still had folks waiting outside to be seated.

Got back to the Hotel Room for the night.

Off to Corbett

The next morn on Sept 25^th, Sunday, The resort cab with Driver Pooran picked us up from the Hotel in the morning at 9.30 am. We started off on our long drive to Corbett which is 250 kms away.

Stopped for lunch at Tadka Dhaba alongthe way. The Dhaba run by a sardaarji ( surprising?) had pictures put up on the walls – of the smart dapper Sardaar posing with John Abraham, and a few other Bolly characters.. All supposedly having visited his Tadka Dhaba.

There was also a Music and Chooran Shop peddling stuff beside the Tadka Dhaba. If the English have their Fish and Chips, we sure have our Music and Chooran for a heady combo.

Along the way, we were fortunate to pass through quite a few Mayawati sponsored Faatak/Dwaars. One might have expected these structures to be large concrete structures in memory of her heroes like Ambedkar and Kanshi Ram. Instead, these Faataks were some make-shift iron structures put up to possibly prove to the masses that the project has been completed . Mission Completed.

Reached the Resort after a topsy turvy drive for almost an hour past rocky crater stretches of roads past Moradabad and Kashipur. Moradabad – yes our own Azharuddin is the MP of this large constituency. The roads on this prime drive from Delhi to Corbett had to be seen to be believed. Rather, had to be experienced to be believed.

Reached the Resort at 5 pm. Corbett is just beyond Ramnagar, a town with a Railway Station. Just another town like every other small town. We stopped by at Ramnagar and got some essentials like bread, curd and fruits before reaching the Resort.

The Room Number 1904 at the Resort had a fabulous view – placed on the banks of River Kosi. The room facing the river and the Hills. It was a great relief for all of us to witness this scenic beauty – all the more after the long drive from Delhi.

Room 1904 was going to be our Home for the next 3 nights – Sunday, Monday, Tuesday.

Devika was showing signs of fever and cough as we arrived in Corbett. Uma had stocked up on medicine for her – having consulted with her paediatrician Dr Sheetal in HSR Layout, Bangalore before we set off for our holiday.

On Monday, we decided to lze around in the Resort – if you can term Rafting on the River Kosi that. We decided to explore the tough waters of River Kosi – with a mini rafting session. This lasted all of 30 minutes in the waters. Just about time for some photo opportunities and videography by Uma – from the balcony of our room.

On Tuesday, Chinmay and Papa set off for the Safari expedition from the Resort. This was meant to be our tryst with the famous Corbett Tiger. Chinmay and Papa prepared for the early morning safari trip by equipping ourselves with the needed tools and gadgets – ie a T-shirt with the picture of the Tiger. The mood was set right with our attire.

Well before the break of dawn, while the rest of humanity was fast asleep, Papa and Chinmay set off on our Safari – in a Gypsy that picked us up from the Resort at 5 am.

Just outside the Resort, the Gypsy Driver slowed down on seeing some movement in the bushes – and showed us a good sighting of the Sambar and the Antlered Spotted deer. WE drove to the Government Office that issues the passes every morning for entry into the Jhirna Gate of Corbett Tiger Reserve. Only 26 passes are issued every morning – so it was a First Come, First Get melee. Thanks to some Good Jugaad done by our middleman ( yes, may this tribe survive on and on) , Chinmay and Papa were soon on their way with the Last Pass of the Morning. Wd also had Pandeyji as our Guide for the Safari.

We drove around after entering the Jhirna Gate – the only Gate that is open at this time of the year while the other three main gates are closed. The drive helped us spot some spotted deer, Jungle fowl ( a good exotic term for our Naaadan Kozhi) , a fox, some more deer and some more deer. Chinmay began asking why the tigers and elephants were not making their appearance before us.

The Gypsy stopped in front of a Tree House ( machaan) – and encouraged us to scale the Machaan. Papa and Chinmay ventured forth and relived and revisited the feelings of Jim Corbett seated on a machaan waiting for his tigers.

By 7.30 am, we reached a Jungli Restaurant ( yes, that too is assured). Stopped by for chaay and Maggi Noodles !

So our Safari escapade came to an end with the Gypsy dropping us back at the Resort by 9am.

So our Safari trip in anticipation of sighting the Corbett Tiger ended with not even the sighting of pugmarks or even tiger excreta!

Uma and Devika had woken up by this time – with Devika showing signs of improvement from her fevered state.

We spent the rest of the day ( Tuesday) at the resort – with Chinmay cycling around the Resort – and delighted that he could successfully manage to tame the mannerisms of the bicycle that had been refusing to obey his instructions earlier.

Setting Off for Mussoorie

On Wednesday morning ( Sept 28^th), we checked out of Corbett Resort – and had the Taxi drive from Corbett to Mussoorie. We began early at 6.30 am from Corbett.

This drive is about 275 kilometres distance – between Corbett to Mussoorie. We passed by Haridwar enroute. Reached Dehradun, the capital city of UK state ( Uttara Khand). The climb to Mussoorie began from Dehradun – and is about 30kms away.

During this drive from Corbett to Mussoorie, Papa and Chinmay took some good photographs whiels eated inside the Tavera. We clicked pictures on the Sony Camera – of Devika in action.

We reached Mussoorie Mall Road by 1.30 pm. The Taxi was not permitted to enter Mall Road and we had to get off at Barrier, as the entry point of Mall Road is called.

From the Barrier , we engaged two Cycle Rickshaws to transport all of us –comprising Papa, Mama, Chinmay, Devika and 8 pieces of luggage. The Rickshaws dropped us at the Point from where the Mussoorie Resort Vehicle picked us up.

In the midst of all the confusion to transport the luggage from the Tavera to the Cycle Rickshaw, we realized ( 3 hours later) that the Sony Camera had gone missing. This camera had done itself proud over the last 4 years. Along with this camera, the pictures also went missing that had been captured with this camera. May the camera rest in peace and do its new owner and finder proud.

The Avalon Resort, Mussoorie is reached after a steep climb from Mall Road. This was going to be out abode for the next 2 nights – Wednesday and Thursday.

After having spent time at many Resorts, this property was not really upto the mark. More from the perspective of its cleanliness, facilities available and overall impressions.

September month end is also less of a season in this Hill town – and the roads were less than teeming with the holidaying masses.

Over the next two days, we spent time walking around the Mall Road, window shopping, actual shopping and fooding.

Mussoorie is the town that Ruskin Bond has chosen to settle down in – and we shopped at the Book Store on Mall Road that stocked lots of his books. Ruskin Bond visits this Book Store every Saturday – and autographs someof his books. We purchased some autopraphed books for ourselves and also for Mrs. Saha Ghosh ( Ayesha’s mother) , who was going tp be hosting us in Delhi soon.

With all the time to spend on Mall Road, we did our best to add to the economy of the Hill Town by indulging at Sagar Ratna, Nirulas and also at the local Mom and Pop stores.

Chinmay and Devika were then put through the joy and ordeal of being decked up in local Hill Station attire – with some good pictures captured in their attired splendor. Many many years later, Chinmay and Devika might give their parents a dressing down for having made them go through the ordeal of these dressing sessions, notwithstanding their objections and not-too-pleased expressions.

We also took the Ropeway from Mall Road to Gun Hill – a steep climb for about 500 metres. This Ropeway has been in operation for tourists since 1970. Our fellow passengers in the Cable Car were a family of tourists from Nepal. At Gun Hill, Mama and Chinmay spent their time picking up some magic tricks from the local shops. Chinmay has serious plans to expose his new skills and talent to his unsuspecting friends and family soon on his successful graduation of the Ten Minute Long Magic Tricks Course from the Mussoorie Roadside School of Local Magic.

We checked out from Avalon, Mussoorie on Friday ( Sept 30^th) by 1 pm. Took a Cab from the Mall Road to Dehra Dun.

Enroute from Mussoorie to Dehradun Railway Station by Taxi, we stopped by for good lunch at a Restautant. The taxi driver told us that his routine is basically made up of this shuttle service from Mussoorie to Dehradun. During the season, which is primarily three months of April – May-June, he gets some good business. Otherwise, during off seasons, he gets a trip once in 2-3 days. His life is made of Rupees 1500 of salary alongwith 10% of the Taxi fare. The Taxi Fare from Mussoorie to Dehra Dun is all of Rs 600.

Dilli Darshan

While in Corbett, we had booked Train tickets online from Dehradun to Delhi by Shatabdi Express. This was a good experience for us – the Train travel was relaxed and peaceful.

Shatabdi Express reached New Delhi at 10.30 pm

Spent the night of Friday at a vacant Flat of a school classmate of mine - in Mayapuri.

Woke up on Saturday morning (Oct 1^st) and decided to have a quick drive of Delhi city.

We took a taxi and went around India Gate, Rail Museum , a few embassies of Chanakyapuri, quick sightseeing of Red Fort, Lunch at Hotel Pindi on Pandara Road, Quick clothes Shopping for all of us at Sarojini Nagar market and then reached Dwarka by 5 pm at Ayesha’s mom’s house.

Red Fort happened thanks to the insistence of Chinmay – who wanted to see Akbar’s Palace – as he has been reading a lot of Akbar-Birbal tales of late!

Shopping for Clothes happened because we needed to get decently attired to go for a Durga Puja Pandal visit with Ayesha’smother – to Chanakyapuri Bengali Association of IAS families! This was a bonus that was unanticipated when we set off on our Holiday.

ON Sunday morning( Oct 2nd) , we had a quick travel on Delhi Metro – from Dwarka Sectior 10 to Dwarka Mode and back. This was to experience the Indian Metro for the first time.

Returned by 1 pm for a feasty lunch at home with aunty.

We left Dwarka – dropped by Aunty at the Delhi Airport to take our flight to Bangalore in the evening.

This piece is being typed in furiously on the flight to Bangalore - as the flight is shortly landing in Bangalore. The time now is 8 pm on Sunday.

So it is back to Bangalore after 8 days of North Indian holidaying. Devika is much better now – and glowing as she is heading back home!

Chinmay is happy that he is getting home soon – and his school is not reopening for another week.

Mama is glad to be back home – to get her home back in shape and pack the stuff for her hubby who has to leave for an official London on Monday night.

Papa is happy to be back home – to catch up on some hours of sleep before heading to the Railway Station to pick up Daddy at 4 am on Monday morn!

ET Now Coverage of our Startup - Sept 2011

2011-09-11T11:33:00.002+05:30

Represented our startup, QwikCilver Solutions on this Panel Discussion - on ET Now, the Business Channel of the Times Group. The Panel had Kishore Biyani trying to understand, appreciate and evaluate in 30 seconds all that we have been doing over the last 30months in the Indian market.

The Program was telecast in September 2011 in India.

Haanjee. It happened in India

2011-08-31T17:50:00.003+05:30

Am no teeny bopper. Not any longer atleast. Infact, dont think was ever one. And still I sense that I have been fortunate to have witnessed epochal history in the making.

Jalianwala Bagh, Dandi March, Sepoy Mutiny were all chapters in history. I mean, they were chapters in my history text book. I was not physically witness to them. They happened way before my time. I got to score my marks in exams by reeling off these dates and events as they were described in the books.

And then, He happened.

To give all of us in today's world a sense of what it must have been like. In those days of the past. When an entire motley crew of humans truly believed in one common cause.

Until this man arrived, that common cause had descended to be represented by an individual named Sachin Tendulkar. For the last twenty years. No other issue of event ever united all Indians of varying shapes, sizes and classes together than this single bloke. A population could only have this one individual to believe in.

Until He happened.

It must have been truly exhilarating in the days before '47. When one mortal, a half dressed mortal aroused the conscience and passion of an entire population. Towards a common cause.

To me, it is all the more amazing that his incarnation today was able to do this in today's age and era. Among an age of youth who are overfed on burgers, beer, Facebook and fun. He came on the scene and struck a chord with this young Indian. The young Indian across India was up in avid support. The passion for a new India was seen on the streets on India. No mad brigade uprising. No hooting. No mob shoplifting as was witnessed in the more developed cities of England as recently as two weeks ago.

It was a polite, assertive, nonviolent mass of Indians across India who just came together. United by the umbilical emotional cord against an epidemic that had gripped the nation.

The Governmental Babus and Mantris were caught napping. Before they realised, the nation was up as a single united voice.

All kinds of strictures and rulebooks were thrown against this supposed mob.

But then, none of these rule makers found it pertinent to consider that this was just another mode of lobbying being portrayed by a united India.

The Babus and Mantris have all been fed on their regular doses of lobbying for various causes. They are used to seedy, shady dealmakers or even smooth glib operators swinging into their corridors. To get the sarkaar to change rules and laws to suit their own respective needs. This style of lobbying is fine for them. This murky behind the scenes fixer is par for the sarkari course. Favours given. Favours exchanged.

This new kind of lobbying by the common man was something that did seem to be out of sync and out of favour. To the Babus.

The common man lobbying with the Government openly for a new law was not something that they could fathom as being appropriate. After all, lobbying should be a cloak-and-dagger style operation. Behind the scenes.

The old neta, and even the new young blooded nexgen neta - they all cried their throats hoarse. About how it was all wrong. They pulled, pushed, delayed, tried all they could.

And then they gave in. Had to cave in to the surge.

Am indeed glad to have been witnessed to this.

Que Sera Sera.

It happened One Night….Uncensored Version.

2011-08-22T23:41:00.001+05:30

We just celebrated our 65^th Independence Day last week.The nation has been caught up in the Anna Anna scenario. Having said that, a bunch of the oldest teenagers in town descended from all parts of Bangalore onto the abode of Keysee who, one must add, has mutated over the many years into MEG’s own version of Salman Khan….

Gracy was graceful enough to pick us up from home and drive us across the city on a lazy Sunday evening. Shekar, Puru, me and my mississ hoped onto Gracy’s car. In keeping with the mood of the day, we discussed the Anna phenomenon during the long drive. Gracy told us that she had already been practising Anna’s formula all along – and had had the gumption to go thru the sarkaari departments 10 years ago without paying a single P of ghooos to push the files thru the dusty maze of creaky tables and broken chairs. Kudos to her...to have succeeded at this. Must say, one would have liked to have been a housefly on the dirty paan stained walls of the sarkaari office and seen the fire spewing Gracy take on the hapless babus and munshis. Successfully at that.

Reached our very own Sallu’s home.

The attendees included:

Col Jayesh and memsaaab; Lokesh and Usha, Puru, Shekar, Suresh Babu, Shoaib,

Arun Balan ….from junior batch

Colonelsaaab retains the same old charm and unbridled passion to inflict his delightful songs on the unsuspecting masses. His “ I am open to song requests” was a catchphrase that was heard all through the night. It was truly a joy to catch up with Jayesh after 30 years – rather after Class 6 !! Wishing him and family a pleasant trip and tenure in his next place of posting – Chandigarh.

Lokesh and Usha - the one and only MEG couple. ( what guts indeed when the rest of the Mohicans back in the schooldays normally operated on a one-way alley on Mohabbat Street or were left badly mutilated and jilted).

A quick stroll down memory lane to catch up with boys and girls who were being met after more than 25 years. There was a fair amount of cheering and hugging – as was humanly permissible - what with the the prosperous bulge coming in the way of the hugging by the naughty teenagers.

Salloo and Seema – played host. There were many uniformed and liveried staff on duty and keeping a watch on the folks (mis) behaving themselves.

In the midst of the free spirited gaiety, I was on the lookout for any alligators and killer sharks that might have been lurking in the waters of the pool that Salloo maintains. A couple of massive canines were also paraded before us. Ample warnings.

And then, it happened. Robbie Williams played live. At Salloo’s home. Specially flown down to Bangalore for this get together.

Abba, BoneyM, Clapton, Kishore Kumar, some more jhatka chatka item numbers……to all of which I indulged in some violent jerky asynchronised movements of my head, hands and legs. Not that they moved the way I wanted them to. The mind willed. But the body did not. Uma the wife was sweet enough to still smile at me and surprisingly, also let me go back home with her.

Post the violent body gyrations and listening to Colonel Saab’s numbers being belted out, we headed back home around 2.30am..As we were leaving Salloo’s home, a couple ofBangalore Police attired guys came over to sign their attendance register in Salloo’s home.

Lifting this line from Sam Ammavan’s land : What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

Likewise, what happens in the Raja’s Den…better stayback in the Den.

PS : woke up groaning the next day. Took the whole day off to let my mind, head, hands and legs get back to their normal positions.

Land Ahoy!

2011-08-21T14:18:00.003+05:30

Almost 6 months since this space has been visited.....Virtually now a Ghost town.

Has it been a quite phase of life?

Well..a relocation with family to Bangalore, M0m's sudden ailment and her passing away in May, A darling infant daughter taking her baby steps in life, a fledgling startup business stepping beyond infancy, son settling down to a new place-new school- new friends, the dear wife smoothly managing through it all, touching base with schoolmates after twenty+ years, all this and more...

Shall strive to add some random musings to reinhabit this barren forgotten land...

Random March Musings

2011-03-19T14:49:00.007+05:30

March 2011. The joyous times of playing a Supporting Artist's Character Role - father to an infant daughter. As she steps into her fifth month. Exciting times for her Papa and Mama. The milestone of “turning over” having been accomplished once, she decides that it is no longer as big a deal and decides not to even attempt it again. Fantastic unforgettable moments.
Treasuring the few days when am able to be around with her. The rest of the times, the more capable Mom handles all her bawls and late night conversational sessions. One more ample testimony from the Almighty Above that no matter how hard I try, the fact is just that women are simply born smarter and superior !
Periodic visits to specialist doctors at specialist hospitals add to the happenings of my life.

A boring Cricket World Cup 2011 being played out. Played in India. Quite a drab affair. Notwithstanding the efforts of the media to whip up some frenzy among the hapless diehard fans. Of course, my perceptions of this World Cup are mine only.
On the work front, meetings and interviews. Young dapper grads seeking the big moneys and big designations. They like the business proposition. That is one motivation to consider startups of our kind. So finding ways to keep them passionately happy.

Loyalty to the cause is an extinct emotion. Right here. Right Now. I want my life. I want it now. It feels like an anachronism when there are people who work hard mindlessly. Who trudge their chosen path year after year. Don’t know or care to know what their monthly salary is. What their market worth is. Not that the monthly salary is not required. They do have the fires at home to be doused. They do have the families to attend to. This kind of human almost seems like a different species. From a different bygone era.

The Farewell arranged by the students of Chinmaya Vidyalaya for their School Vice Principal Maya Menon would also be one such day. Another day in the long chequered history of the school. A school in Ernakulam district. In Kerala.

Thirty years at one institution. A career built in shaping that of many thousands. Shaping lives of children as they step into school as innocent angels. And then, walk out of their alma mater after ten years as strapping young adults. Been sculpted by their teachers and the positive environment provided by the alma mater.
This selfless exhibition is some kind of strange anachronistic, impractical human behavior in today’s materialistic society. However, such type of individuals are also appreciated by their hordes of students and positive lives that have been built over the years.
Teachers do occupy a special place in every student’s heart. The retirement of a teacher is just another day in the long history of the school. But it seldom is the same for the individuals involved. Not for the individual teacher. Not for the students. Special moments with the teacher are always etched firmly in the safe recesses of the minds of each student. Moments to be remembered and discussed in nostalgic times of Class Reunions many decades later; In moments of rare meetings with the same teacher many years later; in times when these students themselves mature into successful individuals and get to narrate these tales and parables to their new families.

In the midst of these events and happenings, the cycle of life does go on. Happy times, sorrowful times. Two sides of the same coin. Helps to be grounded to the roller coaster realities of life. The Lord up there does have his reasons for what is panning out in one’s life. Not always rosy moments. Every rose comes with its thorns.
As they say ‘ “What the Caterpillar calls the End of its World, The World Calls the Butterfly”.

Chinmay at Annual Day ( Jharokha) on Jan 29th 2011 Sloka Waldorf School

2011-01-30T10:20:00.002+05:30

Chinmay had his Annual Day at Sloka Waldorf School - where he performed the role of ' The Dolphin' in the "God's Creations parable-play.'

The attendees to see the performance by Class Three included, the 80 day-old sister Devika. She was on her first formal outing from home.

Devika was quite pleased to step out of home - on the long 20 kilometre drive with her Papa-Mama. She had not had her sleep through the day but fortunately caught up on some sleep for an hour before the long drive.
Devika's Mama was not too confident of the baby's good performance if taken into the Hall. As a result, Baby and her Mama stood outside the Hall to watch the Show.

The Performance by the Class Three students included roles played by students of Water, Birds, Whales, Dolphin, Giraffe & Man etc.

Chinmay@Jharokha2011

The audience gave the class a good clap in response. However, Devika did not seem to be too pleased with her big brother's stage performance - and bawled her way to ensure a walkout with Mom from the Hall !

An open letter from a father to his son and daughter.

2010-12-31T21:04:00.002+05:30

Dear Chinmay and Devika,

The Year comes to a close. Dec 31st. A couple of hours away from ushering in a New Year and New Decade.

I know you shall not read Post. Not soon. And when you decide to do so in a decade of so, it is going to be so garishly outdated in context; so fuddy-duddy in content; a staccato than a meandering flow.

This Post claims to be a Letter from a father to the daughter.
Nostalgic Indians might immediately expect the father to be in jail and writing to his daughter pining for her father, aka Nehru's letters from Jail to Indira Priyadarshini.
So I must confess to this contrast if they are the benchmark. A blasphemy ?.
Am in no Jail. Instead, am in the comfortable confines of the home on Dec 31st. With you sleeping on my laptop. As I key this blogpost (drivel) into my laptop.

The Year 2010 comes to a close. Ofcourse, your smiling face at birth on the night of Diwali holds precedence to your old man. Over all other supposedly significant events that the world witnessed this year.

This format of Open letters has become the norm in the 2 months since you were born. This year, respected Corporate honchos took on aggressive chest thumping postures that seem more appropriate to wild west cowboys named Raging Chandy Shaker and Rat In Tata. Honchos of large corporates deciding to write to each other in the Open Letter Format. All otherwise boring business decisions are being thrust onto the public by these business barons - with their not-so-clean laundry cleaning done in broad daylight. The neighbourhood Dhobis have some learning to do from these big warlords on new laundry cleaning lessons.

And then, we had one of the best cricket players of the current era - Ponting doing the act. The context needs to be seen. Boxing Day test match. Ashes Match. Played at MCG. Oz and England locked 1-1 in the series. The 4th match going on.
Oz gets knocked out for 98 in their first innings!! On their home turf.
In reply, England going strong at 259 for 2 on Day2. Already 150 runs up on lead.

Ponting and team appeal for a catch against Kevin Pieterson. The Umpire Turns it down. Referred to Third Umpire. Again gets turned down.
And then, this great player and captain loses it. In this moment of tension and lapse of sense and sensibility, Ponting goes raging against the Umpire. On and On. Caught on camera. For the world to see. And I have caught it here for you to see. When you want to!

And while Papa was nappy changing 2 days ago, there was Bad Boy Sreesanth doing the unthinkable. At Newlands in Durban. Bouncing out a Dancing Jumping Jack. ( not Jeetendra but Jacques Kallis). A sight to behold as it always used to be Indian batsmen who used to dance on these bouncy pitches like monkeys on a hot tinroof. You can watch this happening here.
India went on to beat South Africa in the Durban Test match. VVS Laxman doing another masterpiece rescue act to be the Man of the Match.

Do we call the new decade the Tennies ( 2011-2020).
And, do we call the last decade ( 2000-2010) the Noughties?
Any which way, You both can decide on this when you come of age and look back at this decade in the past tense while today, we see it as the future.

A Verry Berry Happy New Year. and Happy Transition from the "Noughties" Decade into the "Tennies" Decade.

Baby Diya lands in Hyd Dec 6th 2010

2010-12-11T22:42:00.000+05:30

Poornathrayeshan Kshetram Ulsavam@Tripunithura

2010-12-09T18:36:00.005+05:30

I could try to state this in words....but they would surely fail me. Hope these pictures capture the fantastic grandeur of the Vrischikulsavam at Poornathreyashan Kshetram, Tripunithura.

More than 30 artists performing everyday from 9am - 12 noon; and again from 9pm to midnight. Nonstop. Sweating their way to some brilliant instrumental renditions. The crowds swaying to their music. Headbanging absolutely redefined.

The 15 caparisoned elephants added to the grandeur.

I fortunately got to witness this Ulsavam as I was in the same town to visit my new infant daughter. The Ulsavam inauguration was on the same day that I landed in town ( Kodikerral).
The town which normally goes to sleep by 8.30 every night - was agog with activity all thru the nightduring the 10-day long festival. Every night. Audiences comprised tourists from all over India abd overseas and the local residents;

And to think that this Fantastic Festival that is literally a stone's throw away from home, got me to attend this festival this year by gifting me a baby daughter....

A truly divine intervention indeed!

Big Brother's Invitation

2010-11-17T18:50:00.000+05:30

Chinmay Chettande Katthugall

2010-11-15T16:36:00.004+05:30

The mail sent by an 8-year old excited Chinmay to his Uncle. As he has not yet been exposed to the addictive world of online mails and chats, this mail is the first email sent from his Mom's mail ID.

The kaleidoscopic colors of the mail are meant to showcase the proud big brother.

The Dad wanted to save this mail for the records.

Gross Tasting Masala

2010-11-02T08:16:00.001+05:30

The media have been working overtime. Poor folks.. Having to carry news of the wedding of a flop actor like Vivek Oberoi.

The media seems to be wanting to make up for the lost opportunity of the wedding of the Century - as they would have billed it. MS Dhoni's.

Is it only the oldies (like me) who find it silly to have to stare away everyday at the 'Exclusive News covered on the VO wedding. The buildup, the D day, the Post wedding, the reception…eeeeeks.

Does the GenNext Youth Brigade actually look forward to this gross-tasting masala kitsch being served everyday by all dailies?

Hats off to VO & Dhoni...for exhibiting the extremities of handling one's wedding with absolute poise.

Test Cricket Career Planning Guide.

2010-10-31T13:21:00.004+05:30

Someone very very close to me is on the cusp of becoming a father. The countdown has begun to the Big day. The Grandparents are keen. Maternal and paternal. The elder son is also keen to want to become Big Brother to the baby.

In the past, such news would travel at the speed of the postman’s cycle. The poor bloke would ride his rickety cycle across the mofussil towns and drop the postcard into the verandahs of the houses. The congratulatory replies would travel at the speed of the sender’s enthusiasm. This has been replaced by this era where such news travels at the speed of the mother-in-law’s ecstatic typing speed.

To keep myself busy, I thought it prudent to help decide on the career for the baby yet to be born. I need not be the best soothsayer in town to state that this is a golden chance for the person to become a cricketer. NO. this is no indulgence here. There is no counting of any chickens before the hatching. Just, a simple scientific attempt to work out the best possible methodology for making a cricketer.

I decide to work on parameterizing the crickteter-making machine in India. To help make it to the Team.

Just as two unknown blokes came on to rule the cricketing game like nobody before and after. I am not talking of Bradman or Lara or Tendulkar here. I mean Duckworth and Lewis. These two gentlemen have immortalized themselves in the echelons of the great Game. Much more than any cricketer could have done after two decades of playing the game.

I am not talking about the noodle-strap-popcorn-fancy dress versions of the game. I am talking about good old proper five-day Test cricket. Or it could also be the less proper fancy dressed ODI version. I mean the versions of the game that require some genuine cricketing talent apart from long hair and glaring eyed gestures. The versions that still need a few pairs of cricketing uniform in white color.

The yet-to-be-born needs to grow up to be a healthy child. For this, a daily dose of Boost is essential. Kapil Dev, Tendulkar, Sehwag, Dhoni etc have all become famous only with this dose of Boost.

The yet-to-be-born has to have impeccable temperament. Atleast as good as Sreesanth’s. The streaming video images of Bhajji and Sreesanth Slapgate come to mind.

Recent research has also proved that there is also something that can be done at this stage of the ‘yet-to-be-born’ too.

The name.

Yes, the name has to be something that is seen for the first time ever by the audiences world over.

Now on the face of it this seems kind of ludicrous and preposterous. Something as harmless as nomenclature can just not impact on the future of an individual. After all, have we not learnt that it is all in the talent and temperament of the player?

There just cannot be a commonness in the name. If common, then change the spelling. If not, come up with names that have an abundance of initials. So what if the father does not have many initials. The ‘yet-to-be-born’ can be packaged with initials that include the first letters of the father, mother, village, hospital, doctor, first pet, father’s teacher, first car etc. Simple. LO & Behold, you now have 13 initials atleast to prefix to an otherwise boring first name. ( example-WPUJC Vaas, VVS Laxman).

Next, come up with funny surnames. It cannot be a repeat of previous generations of cricketers. Surnames like Gavaskar, Vengsarkar, Tendulkar, Dravid, Sehwag etc are all so unique. These surnames had never ever been seen by audiences before these cricketers stepped into their whites. But are these not immortal surnames today.

Hence, it is essential for the surname to be unique. No more the standard stuff like Menon, Nair, Pillai,. Mehta, Tripati etc. Such players will never get their chance in the playing eleven.

Hence, atleast go in for a spelling change of the surname. Please do not think this as an affront to your family tradition if you have to discontinue the surname that has been coming down generations of your family. After all, your forefathers did not have to consider the option of playing for Indian Test teams.

So make it a Maenoin; Naeyaer; Pillayeie; Mehhxta; You get the idea?

A simple glance at the Bowlers who toured India in the just concluded Oz team will help prove my point. Starc, McKay, Smith and Hauritz.

In fact, Hauritz owes his place in the team only to his unique name. The name also rhymes with a combined effect caused by the sound of coughing sneezing and snoring together.

The bowler going by the name of McKay has a capital letter in the middle of his name. K. Wow!

Starc ? He sounds like an alien from the outside milky way than a Test bowler.

Smith. Now, this is quite a simple name. After all, Smith is as common a name downunder as Srinivas in Andhra, Ramakrishnan in Chennai; Raj in Bollywood films. Now check his full name : The full name is SPD Smith. Steven Peter Devereux Smith.

With a name like Devereux tucked away in the middle name, he is sure to bowl atleast on the flat tracks of Rawalpindi in the Aussie 4^th level Test team that might visit Pakistan in 2014.

In England : Sidebottom. No comments here please. My giggles are not helping my typing.

Remember names like Ponting, Lara, Fairbrother, McGrath. The quirkier, the better.

And by any chance, are you are planning on immigrating to England – only to help the ‘yet-to-be-born’ to make it to the England team as it might be easier than to make it to the Indian Team.

Think again.

You may have to face upto stiff competition – as can be seen from the current crop of names.

Collingwood; Kieswetter, Tredwell, Plunkett, G P Swann, G. Onions, S Broad.

Vusimusi Sibanda and Chamunorwa Justice Chibhabha have already played Test cricket while Anil Parameswaran and Rajinder Goel missed out. You know the reasons now.

Examples like this abound in all of world cricket.

So in conclusion, there is no better time to recollect and pay respects to your village neighbours, long forgotten uncles and aunts - than now. Just plug in their names into the initials. Your ‘yet-to-be-born’ will thank the proactive dad for the amazing clarity of thought. And for providing the right level playing field that is needed to help make it to the Indian Blue Colors. Or for that matter, to the colors of any cricketing nation.

You could also consider and hope that Lalit Modi takes up citizenship in Kazakhstan – and makes that nation the centre of the cricketing world.

Kazakh naming convention??

I shall keep that for later, if you really are keen on that nation too.

Prof P Rajaram Menon Memorial Lecture 2010

2010-10-17T10:17:00.003+05:30

What does it take – to make rational intellectuals want to go back in time, recollect their past and pay homage to their college Professor? A teacher who taught them more than a 30 years ago?

A person for whom the Vice Chancellor of the University travels across the state for 8 hours from Kasargod to Kottayam to attend and actively participate in the Memorial Lecture.

A Memorial Lecture organized by the Baselius College – attended by college and university students; and media personnel. On a Holiday.

In a state which refuses to acknowledge and create any icon of any kind.

A Professor who might not have been a classic materialistic success as seen by a consumerist society – but will live on in the hearts and the corridors of the College for times to come.

It all happened in the course of a Day. Saturday. October 16^th, 2010.

I coincidentally happened to be in Cochin on this day. Managed to travel for this.

The day had a motley smattering of a diverse range of topics :

Thematology; Rajaram Menon ; Poothampalli Family ; GuruBhakti, The love and nostalgia for the alma mater, Alumni meeting; Vidhyarambham, Nasrani –cuisine Naadan Bhakshanam, African Ramayanam, Wynad Ramayanam, The place for Ramayana’s Sita in Canada, The blasphemous version of the Twins Brothers – Jesus Vs Christ; Mahashweta Devi’s interpretation of Draupadi, Mandodari’s Boon, The influence and role of Ram and Ravana in Indian society over the centuries; the Feminist Shakuntala Vs Kalidasa’s version of Shakuntala, Decanozing of Christ by Da Vinci Code;

The topic was something that did not need any explaining – thanks to its amazing simplicity:

“The Decanonization of Epics – the Politics of Subversive Retelling”

The Malayalam translation of the Topic is also available for the curious ones.( Puraanangallde Tharanthaazhthal)

The fact that this was the chosen topic for the Third memorial Lecture by the speaker only added to its relevance for the day.

The Speaker was the Vice Chancellor – Dr. Jancy James – who waxed eloquent with a 2 hour talk on all genres of writings.

Would Shakuntala be as naïve as to depend on her beloved Dushyanta remembering his ladylove by means of a Ring than by his beloved’ s face? A feminist version of Shakuntala who flatly refuses to accept this behavior from Dushyanta and hence, decides to consciously conceal the ring as she is distraught and shocked at the abject heartlessness of the man she had thought of as her soulmate.

An iconoclastic version for Draupadi in the setting as a Naxalite – who is disrobed in the Police Stations by unscrupulous cops. She deciding to leave her long tresses loose – as they were knotted while living in the Jungles.

Sita as the daughter of Mandodari, the wife of Ravana who is annoyed with her husband’s debauched lifestyle;

Sita as the Non – Resident Indian in Canada.

In short, these epics are not cast in stone. Society has its own take on the interpretation of the personalities depicted in the epics. Depending on the state of the society, each epic gets to be interpreted and rewritten by individuals during their lifetimes. New personalities come to life within the epic – some continue to live through the centuries while some of them perish with time.

Wynad’s Ramayanam has a lot of new tribal characters who are woven into the Ramayanam that is known to all. This is due to the influence of the tribal lifestyle in the place where it was written.

And yes, the Grand Finale was a Kottayam style Naadan Bhakshanam in the Conference Room of the College Principal – in the company of the Vice Chancellor; Principal, HOD of English; Retired HODs who travelled for this Session from across the state.

In keeping with the mood of the day, the Naadan Fish cuisine helped me to de-canonize the otherwise stated vegetarian cuisine for Vidyarambham lunch - much to the alarm of my mother-in-law who glared away at me.

MEGans Scale New Heights

2010-10-10T20:40:00.004+05:30

A catchup on a Lazy Sunday Morning at Bangalore-560042.

With Dear Classmates.

Carefree Children-turned-responsible Adults.

Each of us were meeting after a period stereotyped by Bollywood ( aka Bees Saal Baaad).

Each of us in various stages of physical capability :- ranging from Gross unfitness to the Smart n Dapper.

Hence, some of the snaps might seem a tad bold and unworthy of otherwise sane individuals.

Blame this on Nostalgic and Momentary lapses of reason and rational behaviour...

We old MEGans scaled new heights - The closed Gates and walls of the School to get into the "7 acre Playground" . Notwithstanding the pressures of gravity that seemed hellbent on pulling us down.

Candid Video Taken - Crowd Response to Ponting Wicket

2010-10-10T10:15:00.005+05:30

The response of the Crowd at Chinnaswamy Stadium - when Aussie Captain Ricky Ponting was out against the run of play on Day 1 of the Test Match.

LBW to Suresh Raina for 77.

A Father & Son Reporting Live from The Chinnaswamy Stadium

2010-10-10T09:02:00.006+05:30

The Background

October 9^th 2010 – the first day of the 2^nd Test Match of the India – Australia Test Series. I.e. if you can anoint Two Test Matches between the two teams as a Test Series. This series would also be soon forgotten with the serious Attention Disorder Syndrome that is afflicting me along with the rest of the Indian masses. So what if this Series is being played between India & Australia. India- the pretender to the Top Test Team slot; The Aussies – now a pale shadow of the team that ruled the world not too long ago.

Anyway, this Test Match is being played just three days after that First Test Match at Mohali – which was won from the jaws of defeat by India. Yes, hard to believe for an Indian team to do that. Aren’t we used to the other way round always – snatching defeat when that seemed nay impossible.

VVS Laxman – playing with a runner ( Raina) played another of his amazing innings against the Aussies to win the match for India – by One Wicket – when we were 124/8 chasing 217 on the 5^th day.

Cut to the The Present ie Day 1 in Bangalore of 2nd Test Match

As luck would have it, I happened to be in the city of Bangalore – along with Chinmay. Spending time with my parents ie his grandparents. On the day. I was not exactly aware of the fact that Bangalore was hosting the 2^nd Test Match. Nor was I aware that it was starting today.

When Arnab Goswami screamed into my ears on Saturday morning that Ponting is being petty and not going to allow VVS to have a Runner if he decided to play the 2^nd Test starting in Bangalore, he helped me get to know of this Test Match it.

And then the idea struck.

So at 9 am, Half hour before the start of play, Chinmay & I decide to make a dash for the Cricket Stadium – Chinnaswamy Stadium. Kept my fingers crossed that the crowds would not be there; that the skies would be clear; that the Navratri holidays would not make tickets exorbitant; that India pulling off this amazing victory three days ago in Mohali would not have revived interest in Test matches again.

Before setting off, we learnt that Australia had started batting after winning the toss. Katich & Watson were at the crease.

Chinmay & I set out in an auto rickshaw. Not wanting to risk the need to go hunting for parking space in the vicinity of the stadium. The auto driver commended me for this fatherly effort – saying that he too intended to take his kids out to the stadium for the real thing someday. So humbling to note that I was already into almost having a Fan Following for this impulsive effort of mine.

Reached the Venue. Was greeted by many Ticket counters. Many ticket aspirants. Not surprising, This is India. And this was cricket. India Vs Australia.

Chinmay was already into the groove. "Papa – how big is the stadium?? Is it bigger than an aero plane? Is it bigger than a bus? How many sixers will be there? What color dress with the players wear? "

The swarm of Bangalore cops at the Venue. There were many a handful. In all shapes, sizes and demeanour.To be expected of course. This was cricket. In India. The cops announced that all tickets for today & tomorrow are sold out. Ie Day 1 & day 2 of a Test Match SOLD OUT. And had not the obituary columns for Test Cricket already been written sometime ago?

No Tickets available at all. Go Away!

And then it was time for The G.I. J – The Great Indian Jugaaaad.

We stepped out of the Ticket counters. Made a few discreet enquiries around the vicinity. Lo & Behold. I had two tickets for the day with me. So what if the rate in Black was four times the price. Somethings in life are still priceless as the copywriter of that TV Commercials for Mastercard keeps reminding us.

Got the tickets for Gate 17. Was told that Gate was a kilometre away . So the trim, fit and dapper me & Chinmay had to trek across the circumference of the Stadium – from BRV Theatre side entrance – across Cubbon Road to the MG Road side entrance.

If this is not heroic enough in spirit, thought and action, then so Mote it Be.

Chinmay & I circumnavigated around meandering queues and guards. Reached the G-17 Stand.

Managed to find and seat ourselves. Checked out the Score on the Giant Screen. Our absence was being sorely felt by MSD. The Oz openers were still together. 60 for no Loss. I knew my work was cut out.

They went into Lunch at 95 for no loss. Lovely weather for a good day out. Not hot summer. No rains. The hot sun stayed away for the day. In fact, Good English weather for a Day of Cricket watching. .

In this midst, Chinmay’s queries on the Existential causes for Test Cricket continued through the day:

“Papa – why are all these big people shouting ? Will the police catch them for shouting like this?”

“Papa – why are all supporting only India? Nobody is supporting Australia?”

“But Shane Watson is from Rajastan ( Royals) and all support him then. Then why we are not supporting him now when he is playing so nicely?”

“ Oh now I know – if they wear white color dress, then we should not support them. If there is color dress, then we can support them?”

“Papa – look at Sreesanth’s hairstyle. Then, why do you want me to have a haircut so often?”.

“ Papa – I did not know they play and have so many Breaks. They have Lunch Break, Tea Break, Drinks Break. Will they also go for Toilet Break also now”

“Papa – why are all shouting ‘Sachin Sachin’ when he is simply only fielding and not doing anything?”

Through the day, we both managed our food intake with soft drinks from the vending unit outside; Fruits & Pav Bhaji. With the serpentine queues for each.

By the end of day’s play, Chinmay had got into the groove. He too had got into the ‘Sachin Sachin chanting”; had joined in the Mexican Waving with the crowds”.

And importantly, I had succeeded in scalping five Aussie wickets by the end of day’s play.

As we headed out of the Stadium and the end of Day’s Play, the son tells his dad:

” Papa we have to come back tomorrow also”

The Unsung Heroes

2010-10-09T22:41:00.002+05:30

The pictures say it all...

Getting Five Aussie wickets on Day One of the test match at Chinnaswamy Stadium in Bangalore on Oct 9th 2010.

I know I cannot take the credit - it was all our team effort.

Barking Up a Wrong Story Short

2010-09-11T18:34:00.013+05:30

The Flight Announcement came on.Ouch.. The flight was on time. Not today. Why today. The weather was bad and murky. The airline would have been justified in announcing a flight delay. Some technical glitch or some weather reason atleast. Kishhorilal Shyamlal Patel ( Kissh) had got to the airport well ahead of time. He had got through the Check-in Process. Got his preferred Aisle seat on Spicejet.

The queue at the Security Check was a zillion miles long. There were all kinds of impromptu lines forming among the passengers making a beeline to get through. A "Senior Vice President-Liability Department"-type of person joined one of the new lines that formed out of nowhere. He almost got past the Security gate.

And then, came a scream. The source was a "Senior Creative Director" type looking hotshot lady- dressed in Hot Pants.

"Naheeen!" Unko mutttthh chodiyega"

The other fellow passengers and security personnel did not seem to mind this. Even if they stood the danger of missing their flights. They were getting a licence to glance at these pair of Hotpants.

Miss Hotpants then spewed forth with eloquence. She had a ready audience. For the next 90 seconds, she held forth - quoted civic rules of society, moral respectability and the theories of judicial activism in a pluralistic society.

"Sathvinder Singh Rathore type of person" - the fiftyish Security person with the responsibility of ensuring the security of all the passengers passing through his section remarked : " madam! aaap tho bade educated lagthi ho. Thoda patience rakho. Sabka bhala hoga"

Another bout of "Naheeen HO Saktha" came forth from the lady.

Kissh was right behind the "Senior Vice President-Liability Department"-type of person. He politely spoke to the Lady. Full of empathy for her. Requested her to let go this gentleman through the Gate. After all, Hotpants was also only 3 persons behind. She too would get through quickly. Simple. All would then be well with the world.

But then, this seemed to cause Hotpants to only get hotter.

"Naheeen Naheeen Naheeen. Yeh tho principle kaa Maamla hai. India has to improve, I was in Venice last week on holiday. And all were so well behaved there in the Airport. Humko bhi improve karna hai apne systems and civil behaviour".

This now got down to a matter of honour. The "Senior Vice President-Liability Department"-type of person decided to hold fort. He explained as how he had got drawn into this queue without any untoward or malicious intent. He had not intended to cast any aspersion on the societal rules as defined by Hotpants. He had merely fallen in line. Literally speaking. On one of the many lines that had got formed.

His explanations did not seem to matter. The One Lady member Jury had already passed its judgement. He should not be let through the Gate. Come what may. He had to be made an example of. This had to serve as a deterrent. Responsible citizens needed to obey rules and play by the rules.

And then, it happened. The "Senior Vice President-Liability Department"-type of person decided that enough was more than enough.

He stood tall. Calculated the moves to make. He picked his baggage. Spoke to the "Sathvinder Singh Rathore type of person" and told him that he was not going to be cowed down by Lady in HotPants. He then nonchalantly marched past the Security Gate.

Kissh too got through the line behind the "Senior Vice President-Liability Department"-type of person. Kissh thanked his stars that he had seen the last of this Lady. Whew!

Smirked at the great auspicious start to his short journey. Decided to now settle down to read his book - the Autobiography of Marcus Trescothick ( Coming Back To Me) .

Kissh was enjoying this Book. Very impressed at the honest confessions and candid boldness of Marcus - who had had his career pulled down by a strange mental illness, bouts of depression, home sickness et al. The Book was Marcus' explanation of the events as they unfolded in his career. The embarrassment and fears he experienced as his international career was cut short at a stage when he was the best batsman of the team after the 2005 Ashes triumph over the Aussies.

Kissh managed to board the aircraft. He meandered his way past the teeming crowds. He finally succeeded in finding his aisle seat. Settled down to spend time with Marcus and empathise with his cricketing and non cricketing experiences. The flight was just minutes away from take off.

Lo and Behold. An announcement comes on that a couple of passengers had not managed to board and hence, the flight shall wait for another 10 minutes for the missing persons.

Groans, Moans and some more groans were heard emanating from across the seats.

Kissh was lost to the world. In his book, Marcus was having problems with himself and his homesickness. Duncan Fletcher, the coach and Michael Vaughan, the captain wanted him to continue on the India tour as he seemed to be the only player in form. Marcus however, felt very unsteady about carrying on with the tour and wanted to head back home.

Kissh looked up from his Book. He gasped out. There it was. The one in a million probability had actually happened. There had been 20 flights taking off around the same time. More than 300 passengers boarding flights. And this had to happen. To him. He tried to do some mental math of the formula to apply to arrive at this probability. Whatever be the formula, it surely cannot be higher than One-In-a Million.

Miss HotPants was standing before him. She was looking at him. Said that her seat number was 23E. Kissh said his was 23D. Hotpants then said that she preferred to sit in the Aisle seat always. That she did not find it comfortable to be seated in the middle seat.

Kissh ruminated " Sorry Lady. I got you there. My seat is the Aisle seat."

And then it happened. The Axtivist-in-Hotpants mutated and metamorphosed. An all new version was born. No more the bristling social justice mongering activist. It was an incredulous transformation. Right before his eyes/

Miss Hotpants. The new version - all coy. all vulnerable. damsel in distress. charming to the core.

Kissh had no chance.

And Lo & behold. Kissh had moved into the middle seat. Activist-in-HotPants was at the aisle seat. Marcus Trescothick was now explaining how he badly missed his wife and new born baby while on tour in India. It all came to a head at Baroda. He went on to mention as to how he had lost out on the Captaincy to Michael Vaughan. Due to a poor batting performance in one series.

In the midst of this captaincy issue in the England team, Kissh looked up. He could not believe this. It just could not be happening to him. This almost always happened to others. Not even to others. This was the stuff of silly film scripts. Of silly advertising ideas for peddling new brands of shampoo with quickfix solutions in 20 seconds.

He looked up. There was the Senior Vice President-Liability Department"-type of person. He was now seeking to occupy the window seat.

So there was Kissh seated. Immersed with his book. Focused on trying to shut himself out from the physical real world. Sandwiched. Not intending to adjudicate on the impending war going to break out.

On landing in an hour (hopefully sane, safely and unscathed), Kissh decided to make it a point to be figuring out the right formula to arrive at this rare occurence and its probability.

Happy Birthday Week

2010-08-29T15:24:00.005+05:30

Am having to put in this post racing against time - as I have to be dashing off to the airport an hour away. However, this Post is very important to be conveyed.

Some folks like me are lucky to be reminded of the Big Day. The entire city has been spruced up for the last 2 weeks - with billboards that would compete with any softdrink Marketing Campaign to woo the hapless city pedestrian and drivers as they circumnavigate around potholes and animals to get to their chosen destinations.

This post is to record for posterity and for those unlucky folks who did not get the golden opportunity to be driving to work with the sight of their Mega Star in resplendent glamour smiling away at them from billboards.

The Super Super Mega Super Mega star of yesterday, today and forever...Padmabhushan Dr. Chiranjeevi Garu has blessed Mother earth with one more year of his presence on her terra firma.
The last 25 years and more of humble life serving the needs of his zillions of fans and followers all over the world. May his yeomen service continue for millions of years. The One and Only Doctor Chiranjeevi Garu.

Wow! Humility be thy name

Millions have been dreaming of emulating this mega macho mush.

Wishing a Very happy Birthday to you Guru.Garu.

The QwikCilver Roadshow in Pictures

2010-08-20T15:50:00.002+05:30

The pictures say it all..

Someone talking about us....

2010-08-20T13:45:00.000+05:30

» Blog Archive » Change the conventional way of gifting with QwikCilver solutions

Event - August 18th Hotel Oberoi, Bangalore

2010-08-18T21:36:00.012+05:30

A long day comes to an end. Very pleased and happy to have organised a unique program in India.

The First Round Table for Closed Loop Prepaid & Gift Cards in India. On Aug 18th. In Bangalore. At Hotel Oberoi.

This Program heralded the coming out of stealth mode for our entity.

Pleased to have the attendance of corporate top honchos of India, such as:

Prof Dan Horne - Director, Global Prepaid Exchange, New York.

Raghu Pillai - The President & CEO of Reliance Retail;

Pradipta Mohapatra- Former Chairman of RPG ;

Ajoy Chawla - Global Business Head of Titan;

Himanshu Chakrawarti - COO, Trent-Landmark

Ranjit Satyanath, CIO, Shoppers Stop

Ameet Rege, Business Head, Shoppers Stop

This Event had to be organised on a limited budget - ruling out Mandira Bedi or SRK as the MCs of the Event! Not that they were considered though.

This then implied that I had to step onto the podium to inflict myself on the unsuspecting glitterati who were in attendance.

What could one call this??

The Nerds Day Out .....!

QC-Event

2010-08-18T20:53:00.000+05:30

Rajdhani Express : Past & Present Life with Civilians

2010-08-15T22:18:00.003+05:30

Nice day. Glad that the Rajdhani Express is on time. It would not have been unexpected for this Train to be late. I guess, providence ensured that the Train was not delayed – it probably knew that a fussy finicky Retired Army Major like me is going to be boarding the Train. From Hyderabad.
Must confess, the punctual way of life in the Indian Army has grown into my metabolism. To such an extent that I expect trains also to keep their time, when I travel. Strangely, they do. Most times atleast.
I had woken up at dawn today. From practice. Finished my 10 kilometer jog around the Cantonment. The niggle on my left small toe made me lose 23 seconds from my best time. I need to work on improving my time. I have given myself 8 days to get back to my best time. I had my daily breakfast ( the regular 2 bread slices with Orange Juice). I then drove out to the Golf Course for my 2 hour daily regimen of Golf with Colonel Bhatia.
Life is a journey of daily routines. After 25 years in the Indian Army, it is natural to believe that. As an Army man, I have learnt immensely during my train journeys,. I always make it a point to try and have active discussions with my co-passengers. There cannot be anything more exciting than meeting new people – who you would never meet again in life.
Getting back to describing my Rajdhani Express – I found my birth on B3 compartment. I settled down for the journey on my assigned seat. I acknowledged the companions within my coupe – 3 young ladies and a gentleman. Not travelling together. Individually. All the looks of proper civilians. To say that my fellow companion within my coupe is a gentleman is a misnomer actually. To an Army man like me atleast. Imagine travelling in a Train in a crumpled Tee, Shorts and Hawaai slippers. Something I would not be seen dead in. In comparison, I am dressed smartly. Just as one should be. The Tee-Shorts-man got out a novel – by Chetan Bhagat. He just about acknowledged my presence with a polite Hello. Looked quite obese for his height and weight.
The ladies were chatting among themselves – they spoke the lingo of the youth of today. Full of life. Bubbly and with joy. They introduced themselves to me as Sapna & Shruti from Satyam. Debjayanti worked with ICICI Bank. I joined in their conversation – about Bollywood, Reiki, Incarnations, past lifes, Punjabi cuisine versus Hyderabadi Biryani, Professions, jobs. Motley set of topics to cover as the Train chugged away from Hyderabad to Bangalore.
Sapna says that she is preparing to do her Doctorate in Theology( Life after Death). She went on to talk at length about how this life is the result of the karma of all our past lives. They mentioned that we would have been humans only in our past lives and not animals. She has attended a course which has enabled her to get in touch with her past lives. Sapna mentioned that I too could explore my past life if interested to. Initially, I would only be able to see some Black & White images – before my past life started to appear before me. Wow!
As she was explaining her past life, she got a call on her mobile phone. And she was amazingly quick to zip into the present day – from her past life. She spoke excitedly to the phone-caller and asked her to book tickets for the Friday movie release of Sonam Kapoor. She then got back to discussing again on this past life topic. Some ability to move back & forth across lives indeed.

In the midst of all this talk, dinner was served. The ladies and the Tee & Shorts clad man gorged on their food. I counted my rotis and daal. Had my measured intake. Had my two glasses of water.

After dinner was cleared, the Tee & Shorts clad man had climbed onto the Top Birth with his book. He had not seemed to be too excited by the talk of past lives and incarnations. He only mentioned about the sad state of the Rajdhani Express – with its poor maintenance. He did have a point there.
I did manage to discuss something with him – when he said that he has joined with his college-mates and have launched some Startup concept in Gift cards in India.
Wonder what makes these youth of today – want to pursue a life of such diverse interests. I guess it takes all of us with our varied tastes to make the world.
Must say, I am content with working on improving on my timing of the 10 kilometer jog in my present life.

The BaalVihaar Class - Snapshot

2010-08-07T22:40:00.000+05:30

Uma Baalvihaar Class 1

2010-08-07T22:29:00.000+05:30

Just A Regular Weekend

2010-07-18T18:17:00.003+05:30

Mall indulgences, Chinese cuisine dinner, Che Guevara.....all packed into a weekend.

An EOSS Weekend here. With family. Given the times spent outside town, these weekends are all the more enjoyable. The first weekend after the FIFA World Cup. Hence, this meant more time to spend with family.

Had a good dinner out on Friday night at “Mainland China”. Our first time actually into this place. We just strayed into the place – on impulse. More because the Road ahead of us was into the throes of a crazy weekend traffic jam. And before the mess of the road situation got the better of me by seriously afflicting my cranial sense, I decided to drive into the closest asylum serving something edible. Must say, quite a packed house it was – notwithstanding the stiff menu card rates. Ample testimony to the burgeoning pockets of the Indian masses.

Saturday morning. Being Karkaddagam Onnandhi – the month of Ramayanam. The wife woke up early morning and downloaded the Ramayanam – Malayalam version. Supposedly an auspicious means to usher in the month by listening to the Ramayanam. The expected daily call from Tripunithura also updated us on the day’s state of happenings in Kerala ( aka Keralam).

Post breakfast, we headed out across the city – into the sprawling Inorbit Mall in Hi Tech City. It has been quite a long while since we had done this stint. We setout with the noble intention of wanting to contribute our little mite to the cause of boosting the sales performance of the large the retail brands.

Some self -indulgent Retail Therapy. Before long, all our hands were full with Carry Bags of various hues and shades. That held all things that one wondered how one had ever lived without owning all this while. Another lovely pair of Adidas sneakers ( to add to the four pairs at home) another two pairs of footwear , irresistible tabletop showpieces at “throwaway” prices, some piece of furniture that would help add to the existing wooden structures at home…And then, had to scream a halt to showing one’s solidarity with these retail brands. And get more far sighted with a concern for the Bills to be paid at the end of the month for these indulgences.

The evening was spent at home – with a delightful session of Pazhambirri in abundance – hot and straight from the pan.

By this time, Chandrababu Naidu had decided to announce the importance of some futile dam project tucked away somewhere - that the rest of humanity had forgotten about. This only added to the drama unfurling itself on TV screens – leading to the likelihood of a Bandh Call on Monday by his political party to the oppressive style of functioning of the ruling party. While we were busy at all these important happenings, the India and Pakistani political class were also up to their usual drama and antics – as witnessed over the last 50 years.

Sunday post lunch sleep beckoned. Hercule Poirot called out from the pages of an Agatha Christie- and spent time with him and with Ernesto 'Che' Guevera's " The Motorcycle Diaries".

Angels & Demons

2010-07-07T08:38:00.004+05:30

This is no piece of fiction. This is no attempt at being melodramatic; humorous or tragi-comic.

A good friend told me yesterday in a matter -of-fact manner. Respectable (like me?) academics-oriented parents( like me?) are pretty comfortable with this.

He was part of about 300 sets of parents who attended an Orientation Program for his child's new academic year two weeks ago. The School is a leading School - that has been churning out truckloads of 'excellent' students over the decades in Chennai. They have opened their 'franchised branch' in Bangalore. Needless to say, there is a stampede for admissions.

Orientation Program for parents of LKG Admitted Students to a School in Bangalore
(1) There will not be examinations for the children. However, children will be given project work to be done at home.

(2) The teachers know that the project will be done by parents. It is requested that the project work be done by the parents when the child is not sleeping. This way, the child will also get to participate in the Project work.

(3) As part of the Project Work, when the parents are doing any Copy-Paste of content or images from the Internet, please involve your child also in this effort.
(4) At home, Parents to make it a point to please speak in English with your children. This will give them the necessary confidence to learn the language. Children are smart enough to pick up atleast 3 languages – English for school & parents; mother tongue , and the local language for the driver and maid.
(5) Please start to talk to your children at an early age itself – about what they want to do and become in life. Start by telling them about IIT & IIM. It is not that they need to become Engineers. But they will then atleast start to work towards a Goal in Life.
Que Sera Sera

Red Velvetty Arachnid Beauty

2010-07-04T10:24:00.007+05:30

Has been a long long time this year. To be expected I guess. Coming from me. Such lofty ideas of working on and maintaining a blog is probably not for the likes of me.
2010 has been chugging along well for us so far....Unexpected events adding to the excitement.
but not been penning them thoughts down. Times wasted on updating profiles on silly social media portals, wisecracks on others updates and other gibbberish taking time away unintentionally from one's own intentions.
This Post is in the midst of the FIFA-2010 @ South Africa. This weekend has been the time for more heartbreak and unexpected results. Brazil shown the door on Friday evening - by the Oranje Dutch. Argentina booted out with such nonchalant disdain by a fabulous German side on Saturday.
While all that has been happening, life on the familiar familial front this weekend has been made fun by the entry of a new mate into the family - what if only for the one night. !
This friday, I got home earlier than anticipated. Had expected to get late after a Training Session conducted for the Business Team of a large Corporate - who is launching our proposed product. Uma was away at work - at her Weekly Friday Meeting.
Picked up Chinmay from his friend Rohit & Revant's place. He had something cupped in his hand. Opened his palm and showed me something. A tiny, bright, red, velvetty resplendent creature. All of 2 centimetres in size. A Bug. A Beetle? He had got it from his School.
It was a beautiful piece of creation. Never had seen this before.
Did some search on the Web - and figured out its details.

This pic does not do justice to it!
This belongs to the Arachnid Family - the Family ofcourse made famous on Celluloid by Spiderman!
An invertebrate. A Red Velvetty Mite (and not an insect).
And ofcourse, while the red Velvetty Mite was being enjoyed, Messi , Tavez & rest of the Argentinian brood were sent packing by Muller, Klose and gang.
The weekend was also brought to light by Dhoni. Not with his cricketing skills. But his adroit handling of his personal life. I thought he did an absolutely brilliant job. Hats off to him for handling his wedding news with such aplomb and decorum. All the mob from the media - were caught napping. With absolutely no inkling of this Big Event. No signs or announcement of the Big Event at all from anyone. The hapless media thus getting robbed of so many inane sound bytes and nonsensical speculative panel discussions of the Bride's Lahenga color, Dhoni's wardrobe, Bride's Mom's hobbies, neighbours' opinions; Breaking news & interviews with the all school principals of the bride's kindergarden school.

LOVE ALL. SETS. DOUBLE FAULT : 20-20

2010-05-19T00:09:00.001+05:30

Candid Confession : This piece has been written at midnight. To get over the angst of the delayed payments by a key corporate customer in my otherwise regular life.

To Be Noted : This is an original script. It is not inspired by any real life happening. It does not bear any resemblance to old flop films like Manichithrathaazhu-Bhool Bhulayya, My Name Is Khan, Om Shanti Om or Phoonk-2. Any resemblance to any living being, animal or thing is entirely coincidental.

This filmscript is inspired by sports. It intends to encourage a sporty culture, wearing sporty attire and using sporty terms in everyday life.

Shortlisted Directors : Priyadoordarshan, Ramu G WormA , Krane Johar, Faraway Khan

To Be Starring :

· *** Sir Shove Rook Kahn for the first time ever in Twenty five inspiring roles

( as Shoaib , Shoaib’s father, Shoaib’s mother, Shoaib’s Uncle, Shoaib’s Mausi, Shoaib’s children)

· *** Deep Padi Konica in a Double Role as Younger Slimmer Sania and Older Fatter Sania

· *** Mall Hai Shikra Wat in a Single Role as The White Sari Clad lady.

Cut ….Camera….Action

Long Shot of a White Horse galloping. In a Chambal Valley kind of place.

Close Up Shot. Shoaib & Sania. They are both on the Horse. A White Horse.

After Twenty successful Years ( aka Bees Saaal) of marriage, Shoiab and Sania are on their way to Shoaib’s ancestral haveli – tucked away somewhere between Sialkot and Hyderabad in some unknown country.

Sania is sporting her famous Yellow short hotpants that she had first worn on her Wimbledon debut . Notwithstanding the fact that she is barely able to fit into them any longer.

(Age, Excess HamBurgers , lack of brand endorsements and retirement from tennis have ensured that she has added some fair amount of excess baggage onto her persona. In the form of adipose tissues).

Flashback of the Young Sania in the same yellow hotpants comes up on the screen. To the accompaniment of Mithun’s Disco Music in the background.

As the white horse is galloping, a Black cat crosses the muddy path – right in front of their horse. The Black cat even stops and looks into both their eyes. For a loooong five second duration.

The White Horse comes to a screeching halt. It refuses to budge now. Kachaaaaaak.

( No Music for 10 seconds)

Sania exclaims in abject misery : “ Haaai haaai. This is very inauspicious. Let us go back to our big home in Dubai and eat some Burgers”

Shoaib (after 132 takes and retakes): “ Nahin Jaaan. Main Hoon Na. ”

Sania fumes : I am surely smarter than you – am a Metric Paas. “

Shoaib seen sulking.

Sania ( in overacting style) “ You know, I too was like you and did not believe in these matters. And you know what happened “

Shoaib ( after 47 takes) : “What?”

Sania “ This same Black cat crossed the road when I was playing in the French Open First Round. And my ATP Ranking fell from 564 to 987 within 3 weeks.”

( Flashback again appears of the young slim Saina at Rolland Garros)

(ARR Jai Ho music as the background score)

Shoaib decides to unleash his latent intelligence “ But Sania Jaaan. How can the same black cat be in Paris then and also here near my ancestral haveli after so many years – in fact, Beees Saaal Baad?”

Sania ( still in overacting mode ) “ Haaai Haaaai – Arrre Why not? That is why I say you must believe in the concept of punar janam. This Black Billi has come back to take revenge on me because I did not feed it anything then”.

But Sania is prevailed upon by the charms and obvious intelligence of Shoaib and she relents to the words of her knight of twenty years.

They continue on their horse.

Sania notices that two Black Crows have been following them all along.

When the Horse stops, the Crows fly away. As they resume their drive, the crows again appear.

Sania feels that Daaal Mein Kuch Kaaala Hai ( meaning there is something black in the pulses) – with the instances of the black cat and black crows. But she decides to still sport her brave self – after all, she has once been been India’s famous Tennis star.

( flashback of young slim Sania again).

They reach a Huge Castle that is in a dilapidated condition. It looks deserted from the outside.

Sania exclaimed : “ Wow! is this your Haveli?? It looks so fabulous. And the media kept saying during our shaaadi days in their Breaking News that you are a poor man from Sialkot. Why did they not show this massive Haveli of yours?”

As the white horse gets into the Haveli compound, they are surprised that the Door of the Castle strangely opens by itself. There are distinct sounds that they could hear.

( Phoonk type Sounds emanate. Massive winds start blowing)

Sania clings to Shoaib’s Sherwani .

( Time for a romantic scene and a break for the audience from the scary tension. One Song as a Dream sequence in Karachi’s Sabjee Mandee)

After song ends, the scary tension resumes.

They both then see a white saari clad lady almost floating past them into the Haveli .

Shoaib notices that The White-sari-clad Lady had an incredible zero-sized figure.

Shoaib is confused as to who this could be. His curiosity gets the better of him. After all, he has been Pakistan’s cricket captain. He has to be brave and show it too on full screen.

He asks Sania to wait on the White Horse. He gives her a HamBurger to eat.

He runs in slow motion into the Big Building. Follows stealthily in the direction of the sound.

After what seems like a long time, he comes running out in slow motion.

Sania is surprised as she has not yet finished eating her Burger. She asks Shoaib to explain his sudden change of mind and heart.

She now takes on the brave role and says that they have to go inside.

Shoaib says : “ Naheen Jaaan.That white clad lady we saw….”

Sania : “Yes, Yes. Tell Me. What happened to her? You know her??”

Shoaib : “ I saw her clearly. I suddenly remembered everything as a flashback.”

Sania : “ Kya. What did you remember in your flashback?”

Shoaib : “ This is the same lady whose photos were sent to me by email Bees Saal ago”

Sania : “ What Photos?? So what now?”

Shoaib : “ You don’t get it. This Lady has the same beautiful face as the Ayesha or Maha or whatever her name was before I married you”

Sania : “ But you said all that Maha issue was bakwaaas. In fact, you even said that to Barkha Dutt also on the 9 PM News”

Shoaib : “ Yes but now as a punarjanam I remember clearly that we had both got married”

He continues in a monologue facing the camera “The white-clad sari lady even told me - Darling! Like you said, I have slimmed down in VLCC on your advice – and dropped from 143 kilos to only 43 kilos now. ”

Sania : “ But you only wanted me to maintain my weight after retirement at 107 kilos saying that will match and remind me of my highest ATP Ranking ever”

Shoaib : “ Corrrect But ……only when Ayesha dropped her weight to 43 kilos do I remember that I am also married to her..before I even saw you in your Yellow Short Skirt”

Sania screams : “Nooooo. What will happen to me. What will happen to my children. I am left no where. You have been married to me for so long.”

Shoaib says that he suddenly remembered his past – in a flash only when he came to his ancestral haveli. ( Rapid Disco Music as backround score).

He says in a manly voice that he has to do his duty to his Ayesha or Maha or whatever.

Sania then says in Bold Italicised Font : “ You lowly mongrel. You get out of my white horse and get out from my life”

Shoaib then is seen getting down. He decides to start walking.

He removes his Sherwani.

Next Shot: He now sports a new look with Reebok sneakers, Samsonite backpack and a placard and walks away into the sunset.

The placard says : “My name is Mallik. And I am not married to Sania”.

Shoaib announces to Sania : “ I will go and meet the President and explain all this to him”

Sania screams aloud as a climax scene : “This will then be a 20-20 Challenge for me . If Ayesha or Maha can reduce her weight in 20 years, I will also reduce in next 20 years and come back to claim you from her and get back the father of my 20 children.”.

………………………….The End………………….

Simply Musing

2010-04-17T23:51:00.001+05:30

Summer - A hot summer is on.

Arrived in Bangalore two days ago. Along with Chinmay. He gets to spend some days of his school vacation with his achachan and achamma.. Thankfully pleasant weather.Relatively speaking. Some rains during the last few days has helped reduce the sweat levels.

Sweat and its equity levels have been in the news for other reasons this week. IPL-3 is on. Alongside the on- ground fun, the sordid drama between Lalit Modi and Shashi Tharoor is happening off-the ground.

In the midst of all this and rising volcanic ash levels, one’s daily life goes on with the doses of ample levels of drama and excitement.

A Saturday. The April 17^th. Our Board of Director’s Meeting has been called. Taking a look at the present and planning ahead. Excellent inputs and support from the Board.

During the course of the Board Meeting, Pradipta Mohapatra, a doyen on Indian Corporate Industry & a Director on our Board, conveyed the sad news of the demise of Prof CK Prahalad this morning . An amazing personality who blazed a fantastic path in his illustrious life. May his soul rest in peace.

Post-meeting lunch along with the Board. An excellent ambience at the Rooftop Room at our Investor Fund’s Office– off Cunningham Road. The Room gives a feel of sitting on a traditional machaan on a treetop. An all Green view of good old Bangalore.

Post lunch, we drove past Cunningham Road, Cubbon Road. Going past the Chinnaswamy Stadium. The IPL match between RCB & MI was slated to start in the next hour. The Roads were clogged. As expected. We were lucky to manage to get away without getting too badly stuck among the fortunate fans marching into the Stadium.

Only later did we realize that the crude bomb blasts were to take place at the Stadium around the same time that we passed through the area. This caused the match to be delayed by an hour or so. All the overseas players on both teams were a tad unnerved by the experience and had to be coaxed to take the field. All’s well that ends well.

Our able chauffeur ensured that we managed to travel across the city to reach the Outer Ring Road – to the venue of our meeting at the HO. The meeting with Mr. Vikram Rao, one of the respected pioneers of the textiles and branded industry was scheduled and we managed to beat the heat and the traffic to make it on time. Finished the meetings on a good note.

Got home to spend a good Saturday evening with Chinmay. He excitedly asked me the reasons why the words ‘ which’ and ‘witch’ are spelt differently but pronounced the same.

“ Papa – did your classteacher not scold you if you don’t know even this?”

Saaare , Shut Up Your Bledddy Mouth I say

2010-04-05T10:32:00.003+05:30

My son almost choked on his maambazha kootan. Again tonight. The reason was the same tonight too. Only the menu to choke on was different :- Arnab Ganguly screaming out from across the Dining Hall.

“Will you agree that there is more to your hardline stance than just patriotism? You have to agree as all the cards are stacked against you. It is an open discussion that we are having. I know you have your views but you just cannot but agree with me. But I am not putting any more words into your mouth. I am unfortunately running out of time”

We as a family have learnt the hard way. Even the Japanese Panasonic Engineers have not managed to master the technology to mute their devices to an extent that Arnab can be muted. We now seat ourselves at a safe distance from the TV set. Right across the room. At the far end. The room is not small. Not seriously large either. But then, hell hath no fury like an Arnab on song.

As he decides to take a break, we too move on. To Ranjini. The lass who believes and knows that she is the darling of the coconut oil loving masses. On the channel to find the best crooner cum performer in Mahabali’s rajyam, the anchor lass speaks the language with a twang that would have made Kudhiravattom Pappu squirm. God bless his soul. Her gawky gait on stage is hugely loved. Her witty comments range from “ your song was so cute” to “ this song was cuter than your last song”. Anchor person cum darling of the Malayali thozhilaali masses.

Just as the commercial break is announced on the Crooner Show, my Remote gets us to settle in on the next melodrama – with the agonizing cry of Navjot Siddhu spewing his wisdom on the performance of the night on the IPL drama being staged across the country this month. If his wardrobe is a measure of his bulging fortunes, the wardrobe does not ever seem to malfunction – with its rich range of kaleidoscopic colored attire.

IPL – the reality show that is seeking to make me seek more and more on the exciting lives of unemployed stars and starlets of the past; businessmen who are otherwise shrewd have now decided that India is hot, cricket is hotter, sensible business thinking be damned. Mujhe Bhi Ek Team Chaahiya.

And lo and behold, we now have our own Cricket Team in Kochi. The owners of this team will soon be learning to walk their talk in red flag colored Mundu & Veshti. Brand Managers who know the distance from Miami to Washington will now hone their knowledge of the hinterlands to know the distance in kilometers between Thalliparambu and Thalayolaparambu; The billboard rates in Perinthalmanna will soon get inflated.

What with a motley crowd of people including our own Tharoor rooting for this Desi Malloo team - the whiteskinned cheer leaders will also get to start to practise on their moves with a combo of Mohiniyattom and Salsa.

It also did cross my mind that the new owners might need to seek the blessings of the Atttimarri Sangham and its many offshoots. The Sangham leaders might just be working on their own Business Plans with renewed vigour. The Union leaders might decide to have their say on whether overpaid players and overleveraged owners will be allowed to carry their own cricket kits and vanity cases or will have to pay the Union for allowing them this joy.

As the suave autodriver once told me at Ernakulam Railway Station when I tried to make him see reason and take me to Fort Kochi :

“Saaare , Shut Up Your Bledddy Mouth I say …”….

40 - 40 is on.

2010-03-15T18:24:00.003+05:30

This is no flippant title.It means so much. To me for sure.

The new day dawned. March 15th-2010. A day before Ugadi - the New Year. A Nice day. In fact, a great day. Perfect weather in the midst of the summer heat that has been hitting us. Hope this augurs well for the 40-40 reality that has been flagged off.

Pray that the 40-40 pans out well.

Television Commercial in Real Life

2010-03-12T13:11:00.004+05:30

Saw a smartie yesterday. For the sake of this rambling note, he shall be called Fast Mikey ( or FM) . His full name on his passport might have been Shrinavas Prasad Dollapatti. He did look a smart young GenY dude – the archetypical respondent for any sample research focus group for a cola drink. Fast Mikey was equipped with all the trappings. A holster brandishing the latest pistol aka smartphone; branded T, denims, sneakers - also with the necessary display of the premium brand of innerwear - the expensive brandname loudly staring out through his blue faded torn denims. All brands amply paraded all across his anterior and posterior. Just what the (spin)doctor might have ordered.

Fast Mikey revved into the busy lane in his 4-wheel drive. Two pretty young things also visible seated inside. The latest Himesh Reshmiyya item nasally blared away from the amplifier inside the vehicle. Loud enough to wake the brood of mongrels sleeping on the footpath.

FM parked his mode of transport beside the HDFC ATM.. A Big "No Parking" Signboard notwithstanding.

Ample Attitude oozed from all pores of his torso. Yelled out a “ Juzz Chill Babes. Am back in a jiffy” to the denizens inside his wheeled chariot. Walked into the HDFC ATM.

And then it happened. In a Jiffy.

A soot- emitting truck appeared. Seemingly out of nowhere. Almost like a Fake Swami act.

Two blokes strode out. All purposeful. For the purposes of this note, they shall be called Devannappa & Gopalabasaviah. D & G for short. They walked upto the chariot. Looked in. Politely asked about the status. If all was well. The Juzz Chill Babes sneered. Followed by some pointed gesticulation by manicured fingers.

No words were uttered by D&G.

Lo & behold, the chariot got entwined onto the truck. D&G had pulled out a rope from the truck. Nonchalantly towed away the 4-wheel drive. The babes screaming in distress.

The HDFC ATM door opened. Cool FM came running out. No longer looking cool.

FM was soon running behind the Truck.

“Hey! Stop. Don’t you know I was at the HDFC ATM”.

The HDFC TV ad said I would be faster than the tow away truck!!!. .

Urlakazhingu Fry, Mike Atherton & other Ramblings

2010-03-07T10:21:00.008+05:30

Wish I could attribute this to a state of heightened busy-ness. That just ain't true. Notwithstanding the Startup mode of working that I' m currently in, it does provide for extended moments of lull and nothingness, if desired. One could actually find time and get down to penning or keying some real garbage into the virtual Ozonosphere.

Among other things, must say I did foray into the kitchen this week. To the pleasant shock of those concerned with my well being. And this foray wasn't for locating the chunks of dessert and chocolate that my schizophrenic alter ego had wanted to keep hidden away from me. rather, this was for bravely exploring one's skills of the unknown.

Hence, one night, there came onto the dinner table a smattering of something that was intended to be Aloo Masala, Paneer Butter Masala, Urlakazhingu Fry & Pachcha Aree. (The last items have been listed as such to provide an exotic sounding item to this otherwise listless list. Exotic sounding atleast to those born North of Mangalapuram).

Does one also need to add that this foray was aided in no small part by the unequivocal support of the hidden angels behind the cloaks and curtains of the virtual kitchens like www.pachakam.com & its ilk.

And then, it happened again. One more expose. Another Messiah caught with his pants down.

This time, it struck closer home - as this was someone who ranks & features so highly for one's close friends. The world has been his oyster. The playground for the genius - who believes that his gospel truth can reach out pronto and provide succour across geographies with the help of technology. In his own words, this help of these modern-age Gizmos was not something that his great predecessors of yore could depend upon.

But then, this same technology also helped spread the forest fire of the expose sooner than was anticipated. The Twitterati since that Tuesday has been abuzz with all kinds of cloak-and -dagger stuff; lurid and tell-all tales. A Hitchhiker's roller coaster joy ride to fame.

Among other things, am currently poring thru the Autobiography of Mike Atherton - 'Opening Up'. In the midst of quite a few anecdotes, one point in the Book caught my eye - and surprisingly missed that of my good dinner time friends- Arnab Goswami & Barkha Dutt.

Mike mentions quite matter-of-factly that T.E Srinivasan was a great batsman who he played with in his early days in Engand and also supposedly learnt from too. Mike always wondered as to why TE did not get a chance into the Indian team as much as he deserved - apart from a solitary test. In fact, TE was the Sehwag of his era - swashbuckling in approach, unorthodox and aggressive style.

Nobody less that Sunny Gavaskar mentioned to Mike Atherton many years later that TE would have surely got more chances to play for India but for " his low caste status".

(Page 2).

This might just be the topic that my dear dinner time friends could pick up to setup a panel & discuss for their next Breaking News.

Basanti’s Mausi & All The Idiots

2010-01-17T12:15:00.003+05:30

“ Beta, Our India is full of Idiots only”.

She was speaking to me. There wasn’t anyone else in the room. We were together. Not in a romantic way. In fact, this lady reminded me of Basanti’s Mausi in Sholay. She had the grace, poise and demeanour of that lady. The same white sari. The same cherubic plump self. .

A busy Sunday morn. I was busy checking on my 485 friends' status updates on Facebook. Was just not inclined to listen to this lady. Certainly not this morn - not when my ex-flame from school had just sent me a Friend Invite. The irony was not lost on me. I had spent the better part of my school days trying to get her to notice me. My acne ridden days spent scheming my future with her. Birthday cards bought. Thoms Café sandwiches bought for her; even sent to her address; even tried to be given to her while in between the geography and biology classes. And now, she sends me this Friend Invite on Facebook – saying she had been looking for me all these years.

“Arrre Beta – This social networking stuff is so funny. Imagine, having your wife, your school flame, your college sweetheart ( one-sided), mother in law – all now listed one below the other as your friends on Facebook. My past, present and the future all meandering along together in healthy coexistence. Ha Ha.”

I grunted in response. More to dissuade her from continuing.

“Arrre Beta – Why are those idiots doing this?”

“Kya Mausi ?”. Kya Hua Mausi? “

I thought she was referring to the new Hindi film released. A Khan and gang versus the poor rich IIM Grad who had struck fame with his recent string of 95 rupee epics. .

“Beta , These media fellows are raving about Australian racism and all this idiotic nonsense. They are taking it so far.”

“Arre Mausi - The media has to show reality as it is. It is their job to do this truthful reporting”

“Beta – They should not make an international crisis out of this. Just because some Indian boys from Jullundur, Hoshiarpur, Hyderabad go to the pubs there and want to drink in Melbourne or work in shops there.? This kind of fight happens in our Punjab also. It is not always only racism”.

“Beta - why are we always so self righteous…are we always right and the Goras are wrong? These silly fights always happen in our mohalla every day. So why make this an international crisis? Look at what happened to that Madraasi Police Inspector – he was lying hurt on the road. The state ministers were also standing next to him.And still the bechaara inspector bleeds to his death. Look at the antics of our own Deve Gowda. Besharam netaas. Besharam media . I am 87 years old – but my blood boils on seeing this indifference of our media & Netas to all this. They only hype up what happened to some Indian kids who got robbed in Australia.”

““Mausi Mausi…..just chill. You will need another bypass if you get excited like this”

“Okay Okay. I will keep quiet”

Whew. She really had strong views.

Indian media barons better watch out if an All India Mausis Association is set up to unite all such Basanti’s Mausi look- alikes.

Silence prevailed in the room for 20 minutes. I was through with Facebook Status Update checking and postings. Moved onto my tweets. There there…my hero has tweeted something fresh from the Cabinet Minister’s Meeting Room. About his Didi’s cows. Supposedly, the milk from the cows of Bengal are better than the milk from their counterparts in Moscow..

I was settling down into the blissful world of 140 characters.

I looked up at her. She sat looking out the window. A firm but plaintive look on her wizened face. She must have been quite a looker in her younger days. But then, I always wondered what ever made her decide to stay a spinster. It surely must not have been due to a lack of choice of suitors. Her entire village must have proposed to her directly. Failing which, to her father. Failing which, to her mother. All to no avail.

With all kinds of propositions to her parents :

“Please make your hands yellow”.( Haath peeele kar do) “

“Betaaaa!!!”

“Mausi – I am busy now. I have to finish work. I have to submit my proposal to my VC Investors today. If not, my project funding will not happen”

“Betaa - These idiots are so silly.”

“Mausi – I told you to let Australia take care of itself. Just drop that topic. “

“Betaaa – not those idiots. I am talking of different idiots now. “

“Which one now Mausi??”

“Betaa – this gang of Hirani – Aamir Khan – Vidu Chopra are 3 Idiots. Such a nice suitable name they have come up with for themselves”

“But Mausi – this is the biggest hit of the century for Bollywood. It has grossed more money than any other film”.

“Haan Haaan – but they have lost all my respect. You youngsters will only praise them – even if they do something stupid and silly. Why could they not handle this issue better than scream on TV against the media? Imagine asking the media to shut up”

I was pleased to be clubbed along with the younger generation. “Arrrre Mausi – are you supporting the Media or against the Media?? I am confused now”

“Betaaa – I am only saying what is right and wrong. Not against anyone personally. These 3 Idiots could have supported and given credit to that writer boy also. Instead of making such monkeys of themselves”

“Mausi – this is all showbiz. This is what happens in the Film Industry. There are big moneys at stake. Big reputations too”

“Bakwaaas Beta. These idiots should have learnt from the Goras who made that film last year. “Slumdog Millionaire”. Do you remember we both saw the Awards Function live. ?”

“Haan Mausi. You had just had your Bypass operation that same day. You still wanted to see the Oscars Awards Function live on TV. Stubborn as a cow you were that day”

“Correct..Betaa - what was that Director’s name of that film ??”

“Mausi. Are you thinking of Danny Boyle?”

Haaan Haan, the same man. How do you remember all these funny names? Such a gentleman he is. He was so good on that night.”

“Why Mausi??”

“Because, On the biggest day of his life on Oscar Night, he said sorry on the Stage. For not having the name of one person in the credit title of the film. The dance master of the songs. “

Betaa…what was the name of the man again and that dance master??”

“Mausi – it is Danny Boyle the director. He said sorry to the choreographer.Longinus. “

“Correct Beta. And also, Simon Beaufoy . I still remember his name. Such a nice gesture he did. He called the book writer Vikram Swarup to the stage. He thanked the book writer on the world stage and said that without that book, there would have been no film or no award. Such a gentleman. We should learn good things from goraas than just criticize everything about them”

“Beta . And here, these 3 Indian Idiots are fighting about this Hindi film book name. Total shame”

“Okay Betaa..you carry on tweeting. Say Hello to Tharoor on my behalf. And also to that school sweetheart of yours on Facebook.”

“But Mausi – how do you know of my school sweetheart and her Facebook Invite? “

“Arrre Beta – before all this social networking came in, we also had the old community network that met in the temple every evening. I simply had to send letters to some old contacts of mine to get all her details. That is the least I can do for you when you listen to my ramblings patiently . To Find your old flame for you after 35 years”

Coming Home

2010-01-02T12:20:00.002+05:30

Suchitra Nedungadi Dempsey was back. After almost 20 years. Life seemed to have come a full circle. Curious. Happy. Excited. Circumstances had ensured that she had not visited for almost twenty years.

She looked out the window as the Transport Bus passed the Mookolakkal Junction. Nothing seemed to have changed in the last 20 years. The Aroopaadam Paaalam (Bridge) still looked the same. It still looked like it was going to fall any moment. One of the miracles in her God’s Own Country that the bridge was still standing strong. As strongly rickety as ever. As a child, it gave her immense delight when the bus would make its way on this bridge to her school. This bridge was the only connection by road to the outside world for her – and other citizens of this Panchayat. The only other mode had been by water – a small canoe ( Vanji) that transported people back and forth.

Suchitra then used to travel with her city cousins who would visit them during summer vacation. Her cousins were mortally scared to travel across the bridge. The bridge moaned and groaned under the weight of all the vehicles. The canoe ride was even more of an ordeal for her outsider-cousins. The 10-minute Vanji ride was a joy for her – more so to see the fear in the faces of her aunts’ & cousins’.

The Honking of the Bus driver brought her out of her reverie. The Bus driver was swearing aloud at the Autorickshaw in front .

Charandooth Jewellers was still running their sales promotions to attract people to buy Gold as an investment. Amazing that “ Pudhiye design” was still the ploy used to woo the buyers. The billboard shouted out that they had just opened two more larger branches within the town. Business must be booming for them.

The bus passed by the Hospital Junction. Sankaranchettan still ran his ration shop at the Hospital Junction Road– that sold rice, wheat, sugar at government prices. Even he had not aged. Though his then-receding hairline had now fully receded. Thanks to the good relations her family had with Sankaran chettan, they would always get their 2 kilos weekly quota delivered home by his boy. In return, the boy would get his share of Chaaya Vellam on successful delivery. Chaaaya Vellam was such an apt term :Tea-water. Tea diluted with so much water that one was left wondering as to whether it was for cost cutting reasons or for this unique taste of dilution that really needed to be acquired. It is not that this level of dilution was an option available to the recipient. Tea was always offered only as Tea-water aka Chaaya Vellam. Period. In a huge glass. Lukewarm temperature. Sugar pre-added. In abundance.

Sankaran chettan. The name was universal. He was always Sankaran chettan. To her. To her mother. To her grandmother. Whew! Wonder if his own Mother also had called him that.

Patel Talkies was screening the latest film of Suresh Gopi . She remembered that her last film watched in this Hall was also a then – younger Suresh Gopi latest release. Mammooty had been her grandmother’s favourite; her father’s favourite; and also her favourite star. The ways things were, he would be unopposed as her granddaughter’s favourite star 40 years later.

The Killeee screamed : Theevandeee Mukku; Theevandeee Mukku. ( Theevandi Junction)

Suchitra got off with her luggage. She did not need to ask for directions. This too had remained the same. Time had stood still. For two decades.

The ageless wonder - Sundariamma stood at the roadside. She must surely be atleast 150 years old now. Giving a toothless smile from her tobacco chewing mouth – “Sharada’s Daughter? When did you come?” (Shaarade Mollalle? Epppo vannu? ).

Sundariamma must be the bane of the anti-tobacco lobby. She was the paragon of good health – even though, ever since Suchitra remembered, Sundariamma never was seen in public with a mouth that was bereft of tobacco. She was still as sprightly as ever. Though, the hundreds of years of working in the fields had given her a distinct hunchback now.

Suchitra reached her ancestral home – and was greeted by family. There was a big shamiana also put up near the pond within the compound. All her outsider-cousins were there too. They all had resettled through marriage in towns close to her hometown. They looked very happy and comfortable - like they belonged here now. She made a mental note – these cousins no more could be classified as the Outsider-cousins in her own mind.

Her cousin, Raji said excitedly : “ Do you want chaaya vellam now or after bath? We have booked tickets in Patel Talkies for Mamooty’s latest release. ”

Her Uncle ( mother’s younger brother – Ammavan) , a local Panchayat Member said :

“My God – Mollu. You look still the same like you did when you studied in RMV Govt Girls School. Who would say you are now the Mayor of London. The First Asian to be elected as the Mayor of London“.

Sunitha Krishnan - Ave to you

2009-12-10T20:59:00.003+05:30

This video is of a person - Sunita Krishnan, who also grew up like I did....in the same city, possibly same alleys.
The similarity ends there.

She stands out today- in what she has done - and is doing.

This video speaks for her.

My Malloo Pride

2009-10-29T08:57:00.004+05:30

Just like the Jamaican Rastafarian drawl and the proud Hip Hop cult of the Afro americans, I too can be proud of my strong unadulterated malloo pedigree. And its related coconut-oil-dripping accompaniments of Karimeen and Kaaalan.

100 % literacy; a matriarchal system - where my son need not carry my surname - but my wife's :) .

A land where I am happy enough to have got a wife - leave alone a dowry.

Like the Jamaican drawl, gotta get this Malloooo accent to be richly appreciated..

For the uninitiated, my accent is well captured in this video: A nice interplay of a superhit malloo popular film and the recent speech of the ruling communist party's Health Minister of Kerala - carried on the electronic media in Kerala.

So what if my english does not match up?

I am like this only - I love my pappadams.

Alice in AusterityLand

2009-10-05T18:38:00.001+05:30

Alice was lost in the woods. As she stumbled around trying to find a way out, she came upon various animals who were looking very harried and busy.

“Can you help me?” she asked as she approached the White Sari clad Cow, Momtu Behinjee.

“ Hello, little girl. You work hard and you can find you own way out, I am busy with being austere” she said. Alice then saw Pronob, the grey-haired Bull Dada. She asked him for help. Bull Dada retorted: “ Honorable lady, it is important that you should see how important a job I am doing. I want to help you all. Because you have lost your way, I will also lose my way also. So that way, with my simple austerity drive, I can help you.”

Alice was confused. She however thanked Bull Dada and looked for help elsewhere.

She approached Gere Dowda the Humble Horned Bull, Palu Lasad- the Hungry Mean Ox, Parad Shower- the fat Sugar eating Ox, Annnna Chi-the Old Black-eyed Bull. They were all seemingly busy with their Austerity drives to help Alice.

Alice then saw Thathi Saroor – the lean Handsome Horse.

“ Handsome Horse, please help me find my way home out of these woods”. Said Alice.

Said Thathi Saroor “Ofcourse, Pretty Girl. I am here only to help you. My days are long and nights are short. I don’t know my own way out of these woods as I am new here.

Alice said” The n how can you help me if you are new to these woods?”

Thathi Saroor said “ I shall sing tweet-tweet to inform all my followers. Even if the Holy Cows are busy to help, I shall help you find your way. Let me tweet and ask if they know the way out. Until then, you can stay in my fancy new Treehouse with me if you want as I have built it myself without any help from the holy cows”

Alice thanked him and walked on.

Near despair, Alice saw a bright light through the trees. As she approached it she saw that it was the light of the BIG COW Company of Ingenia (BCCI).
“Can you help me?” she pleaded.
“Of course,” said Mali Lodi of BIG Cow Company. “I will delight you with my innovation. I will be friendly and quick, and will always remember to thank you and ask if you found everything you were looking for and tell you to have a nice day.”
“Oh joy, oh rapture!” cried Alice. “What can I do to repay your kindness?”
“Just this,” said He. “You must watch my expensive cats fight their game. Let me entertain you.”
“What does that mean?” asked Alice.
“It means that you will be stay with me through thick and thin, better or worse. You will not fool around with other cats, dogs or monkeys. You will tell your friends how wonderful I am, and you will not leave me if I occasionally do something stupid.”
“Like what?”
“ Like my cats not meowing well; or my cats sleeping when they ought to be playing. Also, you will stay with me even if my cats don’t fight well. I want my cats to fhgit every day and night even if they are tired”.

“Why do you want the cats to fight every night? I don’t want to watch them every night” said Alice

“ That is my decision as it is a new formula. No questions asked”. Replied Mali Lodi.

“OK,” said Alice the customer. “That sounds like a perfect deal. I accept!”
“Wonderful,” said Mali Lodi . “Then we will have a relationship, which I will manage.”

Alice was still confused. She asked Mali Lodi: “ but then, are you not having the austerity drive for your cats?? All the other animals like the Holy Cows & wild Bulls in the jungle are only talking that now”.

Mali Lodi said : “ Now you know why my cats have to fight every night?? This is for the austerity drive. They will work hard every night to make all of you forget that you are having austerity”

So Alice sat to watch the cats fight.

Now as it happened, Our Big Cow Company eventually managed to attract more people like Alice to watch the catfights.

And what happened to all the other Wild Bulls and Holy Cows that Alice met in the Woods??

But that’s another story . . .

Chicken ala Carte

2009-07-06T21:46:00.001+05:30

Just watched this short film. Not a well shot film. The message is strong though. All of us know of it too. But just makes it nice for us to not think about it.

The film is based in south east asia - but would resonate to all folks from across cultures.

After all, Hunger is not a culture specific concept. It is a great leveller. Hunger does not know no religion.

View this movie at cultureunplugged.com

Come Rain or High Water......

2009-06-29T17:21:00.003+05:30

Come rain or high water, I need my daily fix of the saaaas- bahoo episode.

Recession Time Humour

2009-06-26T20:35:00.001+05:30

Signs that Recession has sure hit Europe big time....or has the definition of Hot Couture changed...

Raja Ravi Verma's Bottle

2009-06-17T19:06:00.000+05:30

I made my way through the teeming crowds at Jewtown Market. It was clearly over crowded at this time of the day. As was to be expected. Today had been just another day. As much fun as every other day. In fact, Just another Mattanchery Tuesday. The Vella Saayipps and their respective Madhaaamas could be heard getting back onto their Tourist buses. For the last few hours, their voices had filled the entire stretch of alleys making up Jew Town. These foreign voices, no longer alien. Not after all these years. As always, there had been the entire cacophony of voices – Mr. Loud baritone; Mrs. Squeaky clean; Mr & Mrs. Brusque; Mr.Mellifluous; Mr. Grating; Today, there were also two unique barks heard from this midst. A Pekingese and a Chihuahua.

Never ceased to surprise me that this motley range of voices could be travelling together in harmonical resonance with each other. No discordant note ever.

In fact, the crowds today could again be sensed as belonging in the middle aged to wizened old bracket. All along predicted lines. Tuesdays were like that. Mondays & Thursdays were strikingly different in contrast. I could always sell much more on those days – a more gullible crowd always.

Just yesterday, I had sold my week old empty Kingfisher Bottle to a Velllla Madhaaama as an antique piece. In fact, it was passed off as the unique Bottle of Raja Ravi Verma. That had been gifted to him by his muse during his painting of “ The Maharashtrian Lady”. Something about me got her to entirely believe the tale I had narrated. Cold Turkey. I could sense that she was staring at me in disbelief. But then, she ultimately succumbed. She even got her companion to click her picture with me. Wanted to show it to her family back in her land. Thanked me profusely for enlightening her so much about eastern mysticism.

Her largesse meant that my Chaaraaayam intake for the next 10 days was taken care of. Velayuddhan had been hounding me for the last month to clear my long pending amount. Two days ago, his caustically jaundiced nasal tone had not too subtly told me that his immense respect for my ripened state of being, would not come in the way of his issuing an embargo on my entry into his Kalllu Shaaaap.

Click.. Click …Click….Thud…Crash.

I felt around for my stick.

Something new and unknown had interrupted my regular path. I was helped onto my feet by a Vellla Saaaayippu.

BlindMan's Stick back in my hand, I click, clicked my way through the maze.

SuperMan Fielding

2009-06-12T21:11:00.000+05:30

The World Cup T20 is currently on in England.

The League match between Sri Lanka and West Indies saw an outstanding piece of fielding by the Srilankan fielder at the boundary - by Angelo Mathews.

There was superman acrobatics at the boundary - along with brilliant presence of mind exhibited by him. In fact, this fielding by him even perplexed the umpires -as to whether it was a six or was fielded legitimately. Finally, even the Rule Books & MCC declared that the fielding was legitimate. It was a proper save - though not a catch taken.

See the video for yourself...

This piece of fielding reminded me of the last ball six in the Bollywood Film - LAGAAN.

Our hero Bhuvan - has to score off the last ball - to help the village keep their land or else, it all goes to the colonial englishmen. If only, the English Captain had shown the presence of mind that Angelo Mathews showed in England - then, the ending of LAGAAN would have been different!!!!

Here, is the video of the last over of the LAGAAN FILM.

For those of you, interested in knowing how a boundary is to be declared or not, it all is described quite graphically in Rule # 19.3 :

Scoring a boundary

(a) A boundary shall be scored and signalled by the umpire at the bowler's end whenever, while the ball is in play, in his opinion

(i) the ball touches the boundary, or is grounded beyond the boundary.
(ii) a fielder, with some part of his person in contact with the ball, touches the boundary or has some part of his person grounded beyond the boundary.

(b) The phrases 'touches the boundary' and 'touching the boundary' shall mean contact with
either (i) the boundary edge as defined in 2 above
or (ii) any person or obstacle within the field of play which has been designated a boundary by the umpires before the toss.

(c) The phrase 'grounded beyond the boundary' shall mean contact with
either (i) any part of a line or a solid object marking the boundary, except its boundary edge
or (ii) the ground outside the boundary edge
or (iii) any object in contact with the ground outside the boundary edge.

PS : I would think Sri Lanka deserve to win the WC T20 - atleast for their collective team efforts already displayed - and also for their yeoman service done to all other teams - by toppling Australia from the Tournament. Ha Ha Ho Ha

It Aint Over Until The Fat Lady Sings

2009-06-12T17:26:00.005+05:30

I sat staring out the window. Into the distance. Not keen to make any contact with fellow passengers at all. Not even eye contact. It was more to do with my own scene. My state of mind. Just had to reach Patna by tomorrow morning. Only then, could I reach Sitamarhi on time. I had had no ticket to travel with. The holiday season meant that all the Biharis were travelling back to dear homeland. The train chugged out of Howrah at 7pm. Lo and behold, I too was on the train. Just a couple of hours ago, I was having my Special Aloo-Mughlai on the roadside joint near Armenian School at Free School Street with Pranabdada; I had had no idea how to make it onto this only train.

On the busride to the station, I had even prayed to Lord Shiva to get me there somehow. Amazing that I thought of this dude, when I needed something from him. After all these years. I even remembered and chanted the 10 - verse prayer that I had been taught by daadima as a 12 year old. Had learnt it grudgingly then. The grudge was more because of the Lord's intrusion onto the measely playing time of the young boy. Learning this prayer from daadima meant precious time away from the playground during school holidays.

Staring away into the distance, random thoughts meandered past the blank mind. Hope Chetan Sharma is dropped. Imran Khan had screwed our batsmen badly at Faisalabad. Binny is a better choice. In fact, Madan Lal is better than Chetan Sharma. Thank Goodness for Mohinder Amarnath. How do I make it to Sitamarhi by 3 pm tomorrow. Kalra saab had told me that Jhajee will make arrangements on a truck setting off by noon. Hope there is an STD Booth in Patna. Or else, would have had to book a Trunk Call. My first visit to the city. I just needed to make my call to Sneha. My weekly call. The 10 precious minutes speaking with her. Her letter would not reach me when am on travel. Her voice from across the Vindhyas would be my only sane contact with my familiar world. If only her lousy Tamilian dad could like me. So what if I was Khaasi. I was no junglee. He said I ate snakes. I did. Because they were yummy.

I reached Howrah Station from Park Street – just to give it a shot and go through the motions. Did not want to be accused of not trying. Even with the current score being WL 192 on theCharts for the Sleeper Class. No way am I going to make it onto that Train.

About 200 people were as hopeful as me – and better still, were all ahead of me on the General Compartment Counter Queue.

She slithered up to me – “ Saaab, Kuch Chaaahiye??”

I blurted - "Nga Khlain" ( I am fine)

I was in no mood for such propositions. “Chal Phut. Kuch naheen Chaahiye. Is Vakth”.

“Saaab – mere paas cheez hai jo aaap chaahte ho”

Gaawd – she was the creeps. All gawdy rags. With crimson red paaan spewing from all over her frothy mouth. Some gall indeed. Did I pass off for someone with such a delightful taste in the human species. I must have been some sore sight indeed myself.

She persisted.

“ Saab – mere saaath aaao. Us kone mein. Bas ek minute”.

And she pulled me towards her. Real Hard. I was taken aback. Shocked. She dragged me from the Crowds thronging the counter.

A fat hag dragging me in broad daylight. Do I scream for help?? No way. I better handle her myself. My young masculinity was in question.

She dragged me to the corner. Her dirty unkempt piece of sari was thrown around her body in careless abandon. The crimson red paan-stained mouth did not match with the cheap loud red lipstick color on her thick lips. There was nothing about her that I could remotely want to be associated with. Certainly not what I had in mind for a good night out in the city. I was not sure as to what to expect from this hag.

The Patna Express departure announcement was already being made. And here, she was coming on to me. Real hard. Real Aggressive. Real Quick.

“Saaab – Chaahiye Kya?? “

Me screamed in abject exasperation – “ Laa Biang ( enough) . Kya Hai tumhaare paas??”

I was shocked by my blatant blurting and expected to be slapped hard by her. The gawdy hag sure would land a hard punch on me. I almost flinched in reaction.

“Saaab – mere paaas pukkka ticket hai. Patna Ke Liya.

I was wondering now.

" Tho Kya?"

Saaab - Yeh “Mahmood Salaaam” ke naaam se hai. Isme ummr 45 likha hai. Aaaap tho achche mote ho – lagthe ho 45 ummr ke. Aaaap le sakthe ho“

I almost kissed the fat lady in joy.

A miracle.

My silly prayers to Lord Shiva actually being answered. The Lord wanted me to become a 45 year-old Mahmood Salaam for the night.

I gasped - “Haaaan Haaan – chaaahiiye mujhe. Kitna Paisa Chaaahiye ticket ke liye??”

The Fat lady sang - “Kuch Naheeen chaaahiye mujhe. Busss mere naye lipstick ke liye Pachaaas Takkka de do.”

I was running. Just had the presence of mind to thrust 100 rupees onto her blessed hands.

"Saab - chutta naheeen kya??"

I thanked her - "Khublei" ( God Bless). Poora Paisa Rakh Lo Aaap.

I could hear the announcement being made – the train was leaving the platform.

Mahmood Salaam ran after the train and jumped onto S3 Coach. Found his seat. Sat in the comfort of his own seat. Mahmood Salaaam thanked his Lord Shiva.

Thanked the Old hag turned Fat Lady.

Hyderabad's Spicy Masaala Traffic

2009-06-10T22:46:00.004+05:30

In my mind's eye, the Police Department is associated with all kinds of adjectives - must say, more pejorative in nature. With an adverse public image and a feared perception among the very populace that they are supposed to assist; it does take a lot to tide over this perception - that has been built over the many many years.

The last place that I ever expect to see "Humour in Daily Life" is with the Police department in India. Indian cinema does portray some satirical or slapstick humour associated for this department. But more often than not, this humour falls flat in its own poorly conceived plot in the film.

Not often does one find the Police department itself laughing at life - as they see it.

I was pleasantly surprised to find some really impressive information when I absent mindedly waded onto their website. One might possibly question as to why on earth ( the virtual one) anyone would ever want to check out the Hyderabad Police department website.

Be that as it may, I landed there - more by accident than by design.

Lo and behold, one finds helpful tools like being able to find if one has any pending fees to pay - such as the Traffic Challans etc. Just by entering the registration number of the vehicle.

One can also submit applications for wrong challans received from the department.

I was amazed to see the Images posted by the Hyderabad Traffic Police Department on their site. There is humour, there is more humour. Scenes shot on the roads of this Hyderabad city.

http://www.htp.gov.in/Campaigns-Photos.html

The theme " Wake Up! Hyderabad"

We Indians are indeed like this only.

DHONI likes Girls. CHEEEEE

2009-06-04T19:39:00.001+05:30

Telephonic dialogue between Mama and the 7 year -old Chinmay - spending his summer vacation with muthachan - ammumma in Tripunithura, Ernakulam.

"Mama - you know what I did today??"

"What ?"

I was playing cricket today - with some big chettans. The Big Chettans did not give me the bat. I was running and running and bringing the ball when they hit it. After a long time, I got the bat to play.

That is nice. Did you play well?

I hit the ball high - out of the world. It went high and high and high . Like DHONI in IPL hit the ball.

Very nice., So do you like cricket now??

Yes, I think I am starting to like it. The ball went into some place.

What place??

It is a different place Mama. I have not seen that place before anywhere.

Whay? What place is it??

It is like a pond. But it is not actually a pond. I have not seen that anywhere before. It is big and round. There is water inside the round. The ball fell into the water. Then, we had to do something funny to get the ball.

What was it??

There was a ring. There was a rope and there was a bucket. The bucket had to be put with the rope into the water down there.

Oh.. Okay.

Then, we had to get the ball out. It is a funny pond ..Mama.

Oh - it was a WELL.

What is a WELL Mama??

What you saw and called a 'funny pond' is a well.

I have not seen anything like this before Mama. You tell that to Papa also. He also will not know about the Well. He will be happy. Tell him - he can see the Well and ask him to come to Tripunithura..I will show him the Well because it is not there in Hyderabad.

I shall tell him that

Also Mama, you know something??

What??

Dhoni did something funny. He likes Girls..Cheeee. Cheeee

Why do you say that?

I saw that advertisement on TV - Dhoni is saying he will give a CD of his favorite LOVE SONGS. If he likes Love Songs, it means he likes Girls. Cheeeee. Cheeeee Cheeeeee.

That is okay. It is not bad.

But he likes girls.

The English Gorilla

2009-05-19T15:08:00.004+05:30

There seems to be something between the English audience and Gorillas.

Cadburys used the Gorillas in their their high profile Marketing campaigns in UK for Cadbury Dairy Milk - featuring the Gorilla in all its grandeur .

My previous blogpost spotted this and saved it for posterity.

And now, the ICC T20 World Cup is just round the corner - to be held in UK in just 3 weeks from now.

And what do we have for promoting the World Cup in UK??

Yesssss...the Gorilla is back again.

Check this out....

Is it good - or is it better??

Ye decide for ye' self..

To me , this just aint ENGLISH.

Boring Corporate Stuff

2009-05-18T13:30:00.004+05:30

The Goliaths have always been challenged. Who likes to side the big and powerful? Gawd...David has always been the chosen one. The favoured one.

While buying products, say from the neighbourhood kirana store, one would always like to take on the side of the most popular.After all, there is comfort in going with the choice of the masses.

But as a concept, one always like to challenge the big and mighty. The underdog is the always the chosen side to root for. After all, the big guy always conjures up the image of the big bad bully.

This is the same in the world of business too. Big boys are always seen with suspicion. Microsoft has more often than not, been fighting litigation in some nook or corner of the world.

Google is another such company. You might wonder - how so?? After all is Google a big company?? Aint this Google only a simple and free service that I use to look up something on the internet. Right?? Then,, how can they be big?

Most of us operating in the Internet world would be aware of what Google Adwords are.

For the benefit of those who are not in the know, here is a short description of what this is all about. Principally, Google offers to carry advertisements on their real estate ( read : sides of the webpage) by auctioning words and phrases – the price of which varies based on their popularity. For example, the phrase “MBA education” would be expensive / whereas the word “cowdung” might not be so much.

For the bidding party, the game is all about trying to woo the interested prospect to easily surf into their webpage by using these words and phrases. The words can also be added to the metatags of the required webpage – so as to get the search engine crawlers to read them easily.

Before this gets to be too creepy with mentions of crawlers and spiders, it is sufficient to say that Google has made this its impressively winning proposition – leaving all others way behind in the race. Over the last few years, Google has been the astounding success the world over.

Cent by cent, nickel by nickel, peso by peso, paisa by paisa, yen by yen, they have gone on to become a massive 15 billion USD company.

WHAT?? 15 BILLION DOLLARS??

And of course, this has spawned a whole new industry, marketing practitioners and consultants – who advise brands on furthering their presence on this mode of communication.

However, as with all things successful, there are naysayers who come to the fore. This auction-style affair with Internet search terms has had problems – especially when dealing with registered trademarks. Corporate spend moneys, lots of it, on establishing their credentials and rights to a specific trademarked term or brandname. And lo and behold, they have found their invested moneys going down the Virtual drain – when someone else bids for their term. Fair? You must be kidding. This has been a cause for anguish and ire for quite a few.

Several cases have been filed in court against Google over their practice of selling Adwords. The Jury is still out on this matter. Is it wrong to sell trademarked words?

A potential class action suit is beginning to come up now. Firepond, a sales software company is considering to take on Google – on the grounds that the Adwords platform conceptually infringes on their trademarks. It will be difficult for Firepond – given the past verdicts. If they are able to impress upon other companies too who feel similarly, it could be busy times ahead for the legal department of the giant.

Will a class action suit finally tell us whether it is legally right or wrong to be selling registered trademarks for search engine use? Only time will tell…

To be fair to Google, it would well nigh be impossible for them to check on the trademarks of each of the terms being bid for by the millions of advertisers on their platform . And if one considers the geographic spread as well, it makes it that much more cumbersome too.

Que Sera Sera

Luck By Chance

2009-05-15T15:54:00.000+05:30

Some human acts by design or by accident, become part of folklore. History is strewn with such instances. I shall refrain from going back into anecdotal history. Shall limit my anecdotal story to the game of cricket.

And to the IPL itself.

The IPL 2008 - in its first year, is seen as the ultimate sporting success of the 21st century thus far, ( atleast as I herald it).

One individual player has been the star of the IPL. SHANE WARNE.

He has become the darling of the masses - across India. The Lord of his Team. The successful King of the IPL.

All this is known to all and sundry.

What is probably not known - is that Shane Warne was not chosen by the Rajasthan Royals by design but by accident!!!

Wow? Cannot be True?

This cannot really be verified now - but has been mentioned by some people in the know.

Supposedly, this is all coming out in an upcoming Book : 'IPL - An Inside Story'.

Quoting verbatim:

The book has what it says is an eye-witness account of the first auction by the CEO of a franchise. "Warne's was the first name that came up as the 78 players' names were picked up. But no one was willing to pick him up at the reserve price. The auction was headed for disaster within the first few minutes.

"Since [Lalit] Modi has some interest in the Jaipur team, he made eye contact with [Manoj] Badale and Co. and nudged them to start bidding. Jaipur raised the placard, hoping other teams would jump into the fray. But no other team bid for Warne. Jaipur, it seemed, was saddled with Warne."

And to think, the Rajasthan Royals actually felt wronged - and that they felt saddled with an old retired bloke who seemingly did not belong to the new T20 era.

Dildo, BevdaaKing, Desis Ma'am, Bublee & all other Maaliks would be ruing their missed chance while Big Sister would be thanking her lucky stars. How lucky can Big Sister get in her life??

Some stroke of big luck indeed.

I am starting to like this Cricket Game

2009-05-13T20:34:00.005+05:30

Thanks to various cataclysmic factors, have been away from the psycho musings blogosphere for a while. A bit too long a while actually. Before this becomes a habit, thought it prudent to do something about it. And hence, this Post.

The IPL has been on for the last few weeks. Friends, Fans, fiends and foes have been placing their wagers on teams, players and coaches. Team owners are counting their bank balances.

In this midst, my 7 year old, has also decided to go in for a change in his favoured profession.

Chinmay has decided to take on the role of ' expert commentator ' on all things that resemble cricket. To add to the rest of the 1 billion ( and counting)

'Papa - I think I am starting to understand this cricket now.'

'Papa - it is so easy for anybody to defeat this Calcutta Knightriders team'.

'I think Shane Warne is a nice captain Papa'

' Eeeeks - Why are these girls always dancing. So dumb they are".

' We dont need to watch any match of the Calcutta team now. We know who will win anyway."

' I dont like Sreesanth. He is always angry.'

' Papa, I think Hyderabad will play well.'

' Dhoni is also good Papa. Chennai Superkings will play well'.

So watch out - Sunny, Chappell, Harsha, Shastri, Manjrekar...the NexGen of cricket experts is knocking on your doors here..

IPL - John kaa Naaam Badnaaam Naa karo

2009-04-21T15:16:00.004+05:30

It just does not get excitingly murkier than this. IPL 2009 is on. In the midst of the matches, there is sordid drama happening on the inside of one of the most marketing savvy teams. Led by the dashing filmstar. Ooops. Not Led. Owned by the dashing filmstar. Must be a strange feeling - to feel that " I own Ganguly" or " I own Brett Lee" or even " I own Tendulkar"!!!

Getting back to the excitingly murky part. It looks like KKR is onto something smartly innovative or possibly sinister. Depends on how it all pans out in due course of time. One of the players on the KKR team - is secretly blogging about the happenings behind closed doors.. About the team meetings and the goingson ; Of the ego clashes, ego bruises and ego brushes happening between coach & players; player & player, owner and player. .

The writing is so witty - and interesting - that is hard to fathom that some player who is so witty is actually also gutsy enough to do it - ie bringing it all out into the Open. Especially when it is only a matter of time before he is caught red handed -or with his pants down or... or ... or with his fingers on the keyboard. Anyway, the reading is really witty stuff.

There are such explicit references to Ganguly, Gayle, McCullum, SRK, VVS, Srisanth, Ishant Sharma, John Buchanan.....an not all in good light!!! Hurry before it gets pulled down..

http://fakeiplplayer.blogspot.com

Hoping the "Fake Player" keeps at it..Any guesses who it could be?

Or is the Blog title a give away - Fake IPL Player!!!!

Fantastic Marketing & PR at play here.

Enough is not Enough

2009-04-18T12:11:00.007+05:30

Yippie it is April 18th. Modi has done it. Again.

IPL is here. As one commentator put it, there is so much SILLY MONEY being thrown at cricketers for the IPL , that it is not funny.

Who now can resist this temptation.

SILLY is a silly term to use. After all, aint it all a matter of commerce. If filmstars are fine to get paid their big $$$, even after emoting badly - after takes, retakes and edits, then what is wrong with players getting paid these ludicrous sums - if there is market willing to gleefully lap it all up.

Thanks to this money being thrown around, we have players scampering to join in. Foreign expats are now most unmindful of the traffic snarls, slums and poverty of India - and loving the very crowds that they hated when they tour India. Delhi Belly has been replaced by Delhi DilSe.

Indian players also throwing caution and their reputations to the winds - and joining in the tamaasha that is 20-20. So we have players who have retired from the game - still wanting to make that last Hurrah of potful & fistfuls of dollars. There is dear Dada and Lovable Jumbo still playing on in this version of the Game - not minding if their reputations are badly bruised by their new maaliks. After all, if I get paid a few million dollars, why do I care?

Aint it comically tragic that a superstar cricketer is being bossed around by a filmstar - simply because he has bought him out at an auction?

We had a time when cricketers called the Selectors a "Bunch of Jokers" for being dropped from the National teams.

We now have players fighting with their Board to ensure that they are FREE to play the IPL and collect their sackful of notes. This is Market Economics at play.

And now, we have film stars and corporate honchos playing with the images and reputations of the cricketers - with captaincy being tossed around, players selected, dropped, reselected, strategies, tactics,...all is fair if the dollars are fine.

VVS has made way in Hyderabad - Hyderabad is captained by a much retired Adam Gilchrist, who himself was a none-too-successful captain of Ozland.

The Wall has crumbled - and made way for KP in Bangalore. KP was himself booted out from the English captaincy a couple of months ago.

And now, Kolkata has fallen too. The captaincy goes to McCullum , who hasnt yet captained his country. Dada is mum.

Jaipur is captained by Warne. Who has long retired from the game.

Inshaalah - these cockneyed accented Firangi Kaptaaans will be able to understand the fears, apprehensions, dialects, languages and playing styles of the local lads making up their teams. And motivate them into giving their best. Mohd Kaif being sent back by Shipla Shetty's Royals after one practice match - is a harbinger of things to come.

This New Tamaasha is more like the Romans and their Gladiators.

In the midst of all this big money, there are some MEN who have had the guts to say NO to this lure.

The players who decided that the Game is bigger than the immediate money coming their way.

Michael Johnson & Michal Clarke would have commanded millions in their auction. But they refused to nominate themselves and did not participate in the auction. To rest their bodies for the official stuff..

Ponting & Hussey also dropped out from this IPL - to rest themselves.

Washing Dirty Linen in Public

2009-04-12T16:44:00.000+05:30

These are different times. Exciting times. Possibly. For some atleast.

Excitement is in the eyes of the beholder.

I came across a piece of modern art. Not in an Art Gallery displaying a surrealistic piece of scuplture.

Actually saw the piece printed in Bold on a T-shirt. Actually tucked away on the inside of the Shirt. Well out of visibility. On the collar label of the Tee.

The piece of graphic art was the Instruction on the T Shirt - a branded PUMA, if you please.

Without much ado - here goes:

"WASH THIS WHEN DIRTY."

Zen and the Art of Tee Washing ?

The Day Has dawned - April 9th

2009-04-09T18:30:00.004+05:30

Yes..it is April 9th 2009. The most awaited day of the century. The new day has dawned. It is April 9th. As an Indian, you can feel happy, gay and proud that the day has arrived at last.

I have watched this hype and hysteria with amused trepidation. Everybody, every self respecting media house, newspaper, and TV news channel has heralded this date as the DAWN OF A NEW ERA FOR INDIA.

What is one referring to here?? Especially given the election frenzy that is on currently. Is it a new political party? Is it a new leader? is it a new Front formed? Fourth or Fifth or Sixth Front?? Is it a new PM aspirant?

OR Is it a new shoe thrown at some new leader?

Well, Today is supposedly the grand culmination of the cherished dreams and aspirations of the many Indians dotting the lanes, bylanes, hinterlands and suburbs of the Indian nation & our own Bharat Desh hamaara.

On the tube, all the Sardesais, Dutts, Goswamis, Nayars & Roys of Media fame have been screeching their poor throats hoarse with BREAKING NEWS on this grand event.

Yes, it is the FIRST day of the start of the BOOKING for the TATA NANO!!

As being seen this time for the NANO, I remember the unveiling of the TATA INDICA, way back in 1997-98 along similar lines. I was in Delhi at the Pragati Maidan for the AUTO FAIR 1997-98. The TATAs were unveiling their new "all Indian car" at this FAIR.
Until then, all cars were foreign made or with foreign collaboration.
The hysteria then was matched as is being witnessed now. The crowd of delegates wanting to have a peek look at the NEW INDICA was something akin to the FIRST DAY FIRST SHOW CROWD of a Rajanikanth blockbuster release. Self respecting delegates were jostling, pushing and pulling at each other to break the queue to have a look at this INDICA car, being unveiled for the first time.
The lesser weights like the Ferraris and Lamborghinis that were also on display in adjoining Halls at the AUTOFAIR were no match for the TATA INDICA!!!

Notwithstanding the performance of the NANO car, hats off to the TATA MARKETING BANDWAGON for having achieved what every company aspires for - whipping up a positive frenzy for a new product launch that far exceeds expectations.

After all, a new car being launched is not really a once- in- a -lifetime-occurrence.

As in the fable of "The Emperor's new Clothes", an unsuspecting child at my home, who has not been caught up in the marketing blitz, has bravely dismissed the NANO OFF as too small and boring, and not to his liking & comfort !!

And while the world is caught up in rapt attention for the much awaited NANO, I just need to remember (atleast today) to buy the much awaited Drawing Book from the local supermarket for my almost - 7-year-old.

QUE SERA SERA.

YAHOO RIDES ON GOOGLE

2009-04-06T15:14:00.004+05:30

Yahoo has been found advertising their own services on the Google Adwords Platform.

Check the ad in the image below - for the YAHOO cricket coverage - that has been served across web properties through the Google Platform!!!

Papa - There is a Dinosaur Behind You

2009-04-02T09:45:00.005+05:30

My "almost 7-year old" was at it yesterday - April 1st.

He has decided and realised that it does not take much to 'Fool' his Dad, notwithstanding whether the Dad considers himself to be one or not.

So it was : " Papa - see there is a dinosaur behind you"

" Papa - There ! - KingKong is walking in the lake"

" Papa - it is raining in front of you"

" Papa - Do you know that Mama is missing".

" Papa - the dinosaur is now coming towards you"

The end result - Papa ended up becoming a Fool many times over.

I might hazard it as quite likely that the kids would sit to take stock in school today - of the number of times, each of them made Fools of their respective fathers at home. The winner would be the one with the most Foolish Dad?!

This year - April 1st 2009, is the " Almost 7 year old's" initiation into the concept of April Fools Day. Before setting off for his Sloka Waldorf school in Jubilee Hills, he was not aware of the April Fools Day ritual. But, 6 hours later, on his return from school, he was full of himself - having decided to go the whole hog to paint the house red with Fools.

Since, the house only had the Mama & Papa, they were there to take the brunt of the mortal combat. He had to be reined in and told that - the Fooling is limited to the first day of April than the whole month - he did not sound too excited as he had probably sensed that fooling his Dad was not too tough an ask.

While my son was it in all his childlike excitement, the Bharatiya Netalog were also at it - with all kinds of political tamashas and parodies - on display in broad daylight.

They, the netalog, have been at it for a longtime now - that they have mastered the Fooling Art. It does not really matter to them if it is 1st April or any other day of the month or year.

Fool & Final; Tomfoolery at work...

Brett Lee & I

2009-04-01T16:47:00.003+05:30

Was pleasantly surprised to see my name featured on Brett Lee's official website...though not for my cricketing skills!

Well actually, I am mentioned on Brett Lee's official website - in my capacity as the Marketing Manager of Timex watches - when Brett had been signed on as the Brand Ambassador.

From a marketer's perspective, Brett Lee was a marketer's delight indeed.

Coming back to the Brett Lee website, it is quite an intersting site..not only becuase of me being mentioned on it.

The Blogpost title does sound more like "King & I"

Draupadi, Shah Rukh Khan, Rausgullas & Dada Ganguly

2009-03-31T17:11:00.006+05:30

I was on a recent trip to the Land of chaaya, kaapi and thaepillakatti – read Kerala. Needless to say, felt good to travel around and soak it all in.

Must be due to the nostalgia in the air, that I started to reminisce about a certain mythological epic called Mahabharatha and its reincarnation in the new age today.

In an ‘episode’ of that epic, the mother of the Pandavas, Kunti –is sitting distraught at home , while they are banished to the Jungle.

Her son, Arjuna comes home after having won the hand ( and heart ) of Draupadi in a hard fought Swayamvara.

Arjuna and his 4 other brothers return home with the new bride. They announce Arjuna’s brand new acquisition to the mother.

But Kunti, the mother, in her own troubled state of mind, tells them : “Whatever it is you have brought home, you must share it among all five of you”

The brothers are all seemingly troubled by this utterance. Well atleast, Arjuna is.

The mother also, on seeing Draupadi, realized her ‘folly’. However, the spoken word is final. So Draupadi has to be shared by all the five Pandavas.

This same instance seems to have occurred again in the brave new world of commercial cricketing matches – ie IPL.

How so, you might ask.

Here goes:

Time : Some time last week ie March 3rd week 2009.

Shah Rukh Khan, is sitting forlorn at Home in Mumbai – wondering about the high costs of his Kolkata Knight Riders Team ( KKR). He is sad that his team does not stand any chance in the new version of IPL to be played in South Africa. He is also dismayed that the costs of managing the team have skyrocketed.

When he is sitting in this morose mood at home, coach Buchanan walks in with the KKR players – Dada Ganguly, Chris Gayle, Brendon McCullum & Brad Hodge. They have flown in from Kolkata.

Buchanan – “ Hiya SRK mate..howdy?

SRK ( not looking at him) – Hi John. You doinn good?

Buchanan ( in an excited tone) – “ look what I have brought for you!!!”

( he is carrying a packet with a list of names for the KKR Captaincy).

SRK ( thinks it must be Rosgullas from Kolkata) – “ whatever it is John, go and share it among all of you”

Buchanan ( dismayed) – “ You sure mate??”

SRK ( now annoyed) – “ Yes John..go ahead and share it”.

Buchanan –“ Thanx mate. I knew you would agree with my strategy. Now that you agree with this, I shall go ahead and share this with media”

SRK ( still clueless but thinking it is Kolkata Rosgullas) – “ sure John. But Keep a check on Dada’s fitness. Dont give him too much of this stuff. I want him fit for the IPL. “

Buchanan – “sure mate. I too agree fully with you. Dada Ganguly cannot have all of it. ”

Buchanan realizes that in India, the spoken word of the MASTER has to be followed.

So John Buchanan decides that SRK has decided that the KKR Captaincy has to be shared by all contenders. Hence, he decides to package this proposition into a new version – as a brand new and brave strategy. John expects that the masses in India will be very happy with this strategy – especially as Indians are already used to the “Sharing concept” from Mahabharatha.

John decides to adapt the DRAUPADI sharing strategy to the KKR Captaincy – and decides that KKR will have 5 Captains.

Buchanan is also pleased that he has followed SRK’s diktat to the last word – and has shared the ‘rosgollas with them all.

Buchanan is also bery bery pleased with himself for having innovatively adapted the DRAUPADI policy to the IPL 2009.

Buchanan calls a Press Conference to announce the Draupadi Policy to be adoped by KKR - of sharing Captains for the IPL.

Last seen, Buchanan is contemplating with the idea of approaching a certain Mrs. Mamta Banerjee for a seat to the Lok Sabha from Kolkata – for all the good work done by him.

The Ol' Beauties

2009-03-23T12:36:00.028+05:30

Today is the day of the Tata Nano launch - March 23rd. The Media is playing it up - with wide coverage of the launch of arguably the world's cheapest car.

Coincidentally, a day before this launch, viz yesterday. March 22nd, I got to attend a Vintage Car Exhibition. We actually drove 40 kilometres to get to the venue. Novotel Hotel off the Airport area.

My "almost- 7 year old" had decided & ordained " Papa - Let us leave our Honda City back at the Hotel and get a new car from the Exhibition".

So we set off on our long drive on a blazing Sunday morning by 11 am. Reached the venue by 12 noon - with the scorching sun for company.

It sure was worth the long drive.

There were quite a few beauties of the 4 wheeled kind - displaying their glistening bodies to us - in broad daylight. In gay abandon.

Old Age had not managed to diminish their class.

The cutesies Austin wooing all....

Blue Austin Beauty

Check out the Austin's cute ornamental lighting - lantern!!

The Austin's steering & embellished lights

The Ford's dashboard

The Ford's dashboard & steering wheel

The Ford Logo on the bonnet

The front of the grand yellow Ford machine

The side view of the Vintage Ford

The Packard Eight grizzly machine

The awesome Packard Eight

The Packard Eight Logo still retained on the wheel hub- wow!!!

Check out the speedometer/odometer of the Packard Eight

Joystick-Gear + footbrake + footclutch of the Packard Eight

The Ugly Beauty - the behemoth Chevrolet

The Black beauty Dodge

The Plymouth

After this daytime rendezvous with the old beauties of Ford, Austin, Packard Eight, Dodge, Chevrolet, Ambassador, Plymouth - decided to head home for a deserved post lunch siesta.

The "almost 7 year old" in tow.

He did not mind the Honda City - but said that the next time, we shall have to change to another one.

The World This Week

2009-03-21T16:42:00.004+05:30

A peaceful uneventful week has gone by.

An uneventful week. Notwithstanding the many many Frequent Flyer points that Lalit Modi must have logged in over the last 2 weeks – airdashing from Mumbai to Delhi and back. IPL is on…it is off., it cannot be held, it has to be held, too much at stake, national pride; big moneys at stake, franchises would lose money;

All of a sudden, India has become so amusingly non-secure to visit. So nonsecure now is India that insecure feeling security providing top honchos of states and the union are stating that security personnel are not sufficient in number and hence, they dont feel secure enough to provide security when the carnival takes off.

That the time in India is not appropriately suitable to host any cricket matches – without having an army of Kalashnikov-wielding security forces to protect these players. Players need high powered security to play their carnival cricket - a 20-20 carnival. A version that did not exist just about 2 years ago. And today, India’s economy and national pride hinges on this version of cricket.

And players also are either scared to come to India or are emboldened by the big money on offer that they want to make an airdash to India - enjoy the carnival and run back with their big booty amassed.

In short, this scenario only implies and means that when the country goes to polls, all other games should come to a standstill. Only the Netalog are permitted to play their big games now. No other game is secure enough when all the young players of all and varied political colors step onto their respective political grounds to play the ball.

Alongside, we have two ‘reputed’ BJP leaders, busy warring on National TV. One not talking to the other. Not attending Party meetings. Over a seemingly insignificant issue of one appointment to the party post. And this is from a party staking a claim to be responsible enough to run the country for 5 years. Both these leaders are as important to India’s economy as the same hyperbolic media channels make them out to be.

And we also have a young Gandhi scion, and now of the BJP ( irony not intended) found wanting in his speech making ability. Being hauled over the coals for a speech made – that he himself would have learnt from his more seasoned craftier craftsmen. He has supposedly made speeches that are only worthy of his being pushing behind the four walls of a jail.

There is the uneventful issue of “Maya Vs Jaya” – or is it “Maya & Jaya” or “Maya or Jaya”.

One not attending the dinner party called by the other. Due to some communication gap.

As I see it, the Third Front custodians did not take their Third Language in school serious enough – be it Tamil or Hindi or Bhojpuri. Or else, this communication gap could have been resolved. And they could all have had a nice daawat together in Joyous Jaya company.

In the midst of all this, the Indian media has also decided to give more than needed attention to the Pakistan political non-events. Zardari blinking, Sharif not blinking, Army playing sport. Then playing spoilsport. I found it painfully agonising to see all the Indian news stations devoting all their cantankerous cacophony to the happenings and non-happenings in Pakistan.

And on the IPL, even though the scheduling is not confirmed, BCCI has gone ahead and cancelled the contract to SetMax – stating that they have been offered a better deal by some other channel. Needless to say, SetMax has gone ahead and sued BCCI for this rug pulling.

On the worldfront, AIG, a company that has been bailed out by the US Government with over 100 billion dollars, has gone ahead and treated their top management to huge bonuses. Obama has called this Bonus doleout outrageous. Things just can’t get more uneventful than this.

More importantly for me, looks like a bigger problem lurking on the horizon. The Film Producers and distributors are threatening to ensure that Multiplexes across India would not be able to release new films from April 4th onwards.

Film makers believes that they need a bigger piece of the box office spoils that I pay at the Hall - than is being doled out now. Please settle your issues at the earliest. Or, as in the parable, you could call on the monkey to adjudicate as to which of the two squabbling cats should have a bigger piece of the cake.

The Diamond Spotter

2009-03-15T11:37:00.004+05:30

Isn't life all about coincidences?
People met when not intended. Places visited when not planned for.
Life is about experiences; small and not so small. Meeting individuals who leave an indelible mark on your psyche. Intended or otherwise.

During a business visit to Bombay this week, I got to experience this emotion.
During the course of the Business Meeting, I got to meet an individual, who came across as blessed with amazingly motley and diverse skills.
For the reasons of personification for this Post,I shall call him Nashwell Knight. Rest assured that this is not his actual name - and he has an absolutely Indian name. An Indian -a proud one at that. One who also holds his own on the world forum too.
Not that Nash does not have an actual name but then, I decide to keep his actual identity undisclosed. One might ask as to why conceal the name of an individual - in the day and age when Big Name Dropping is the order of the day?

I realise that disclosing his actual name on this Post would only get the reader to immediately trigger off a search on the web - and lo and behold, all his credentials would be known. That is not the intention.

Nash can pass off for an Indianised version of Jack Nicholson - an incisive and sharp sense of everything - be it, wit, repartee, humour, satire and even anger.
He has been a doyen of the advertising space in India - from an interesting perspective. He is the person who can be said to have cherry picked and groomed scores of individuals into this advertising domain - who are now stalwarts of Indian advertising. A person who spotted uncut and unpolished diamonds and then transformed them into masterpieces.
Quite a few top honchos of Indian advertising - openly state their raison de etre in this category to the influence of this individual. This is fantastic -especially when coming from individuals known for their king-sized egos. And these are individuals straddling the entire eco system of the advertising industry - Servicing, Creative, Scripting, Film Making, Art, Strategy......

Nash is also a Guru in Business Management - having occupied senior positions in leading Management Institutions in India and overseas. Whew!!

Nash is now shuttling across continents - handling a strategic and leadership function in a leading ad agency in India - as its Top Honcho knows of the immense skills and capabilities of Nash. ( this Honcho himself having been unearthed and polished by Nash!)

Nash is not in the best of physical health - with a groaning backache. But retains his zest and zeal for life and its surprises.
He still spends his own time grooming raw talent - as I saw for myself, when at his home.

As stated pithily by someone, "Life is what happens to you when you are busy planning for it"

Keep Going Nashwell Knight.....

GOOGLE or GOGOLA

2009-03-10T17:54:00.005+05:30

I caught this exciting visual in Lokhandwala market during a recent visit to Mumbai.

With the current D&G around the place, is GOOGLE diversifying into Fruit Juice vending - GOGOLA !!!

( read D&G as Doom & Gloom).

Or is it a smart websavvy street vendor who already realises the brand equity of Google??

Ahem.

Kurukshetra 2009 - Run Run Run

2009-03-07T18:52:00.009+05:30

Circa 2009.

Kurukshetra time. Again. General Election time.

The scramble is on. The Great Bharatiya Jamboree is on the roll. The rubber will be hitting the road for all parties. No inch shall be given. But shall be demanded and taken.

Alliances are being made. Are Being broken.. Being forged, being propositioned.

Conspiracy theorists at it. Rabble rousers at it.

Glib talking media spokespersons from each party are at it. Again.

Alas!! with the omnipotent Indian Judiciary having decided that Bloggers dont have any respite and cannot pen their opinions on India's prized natty netalog without incurring the wrath of the Judiciary, I would need to be watchful of my own loose fingers here.

The pre-Elections time also ironically saw the tussle for the election of the Chief Election Commissioner. Each party jostling for their own choice of the He-Man.

The country's future is stated to be handed over to stable hands. After all age can be no bar. So what if the choice for future Prime Minister is between a 77 year -old and a 74 year-old.

There are quite a few other young and dapper hopefuls in each camp. Waiting in the wings to spring their surprise.

Our dear "Humble Farmer who became PM " has done this yeoman service to the Indian politician. He has stoked that never - say- impossible - spirit in every shade of India's Neta. Now every Neta believes he or she can also occupy that PM post.

Now, every splinter group has a PM hopeful running for the post.

All kinds of flora and fauna are also running around now. Piranhas & Fish in Aquariums are being pilloried on election campaigns. Wonder if these actual species would intend to file defamation suits against their names being tarnished in this manner by the Indian Netalog.

Die hard seasoned politicians are wooing cine stars to join them. Nothing new. Has been happening all the time. So, we have a Khalnaayak Baba turned Naayak discovering his long lost love for the City of Lucknow. Thanks to the calculated moves of certain seasoned party lords. The Party has also planned for the contingency if this Baba is not allowed to stand due to some little technical difficulty ( Read: judicial court deciding his candidature null & void).

His brand new wife can then use his brand name and run in his place.

An aspired ( past tense of aspiring?) Bollywood Actress also is said to be pitching in for some seat in Mumbai. One part of me wonders what her credentials can be for this post. The other part tells me:

"Come on! She is certainly qualified to run - after all her running done in her past avatar. Around trees and also running behind cricketers"

Notwithstanding her credentials,, the current cine incumbent of that same Mumbai seat is feeling jittery. Even if this incumbent has spent more time out of than in the Parliament during his own tenure. This dancing star wants to run. But may have to end up running around trees instead.

Our cricketing prince Dada was also pleaded with - to run. But he decided that he has already done enough running between wickets for now - and wants to catch up on his breath.

On the other hand, Azharbhai believes he has not run around for a while. And has walked onto the election wicket and aspires to run now.

One Party has bought the rights of ARR's JAI HO. They plan to cock a snook at other parties by running this song during their election trail.

Other parties are saying that this is no Big Deal but would be kicking themselves for not having thought this up. .

So we now also have Music Rights coming into the Election picture.

Why ain't no party trying to buy the rights for " Pappu Can't Dance Saaalah"

If Politicians are going to woo Cine stars, who would Cine Stars woo?

AndhraPradesh has seen the birth of the new political party - with a leading cine star at its helm. If he is the new political star on the horizon, he too now feels the need to pitch his coat onto some other big star. So what does one see??

CHANGE. YES WE CAN. This dashing star has dashed off to tell his believing followers that he is the Obama of India.

Jubilee Hills in Hyderabad is a sprawling upmarket residential area - and we get to see hoardings on this close "association" between the two new stars. Some gullible folks might believe that Obama is standing for the local MLA post

In this Kurukshetra, it should not be too much of a surprise if Obama were to soon land in Hyderabad and gyrate to this dashing star's number. And also hit the campaign trail for his Indian counterpart.

Run Run Run. All are Running around.

Or as the Rabbit of Alice in Wonderland mused - "We are all running to stay where we are"

Life is All About the KISS

2009-03-05T18:18:00.006+05:30

I wrote a post on my official corporate Blog about my Takeaways from the Global Nasscom Summit. I am re-producing the post here for my fan following (!!)

Life is all about the KISS : and the New Way of doing Old Things.

I happened to be a delegate at The Nasscom India Leadership Forum (NILF) in Mumbai recently ( Feb 11-13th).

This Forum had delegates and luminairies from the world over - and one message was was drummed in as a core thought – loud and clear to all assembled delegates.
‘The old order changeth’.
It is important to find ways to work differently. More efficiently. More productively. It is not enough to try to do the samething in the same manner. The need is to change the paradigm. Question the status quo.
The old norms of pricing for IT solutions would soon be thrown out of the Windows – no pun intended here. Customers are unsure of their own business survival; and hence, are expecting their partners and associated companies to aid them in developing solutions to help make their decisions smarter and better.
Solutions to be provided quickly; global launch on the fly. Sounds ludicrous? Not any more. Cloud Computing is in. These kind of solutions will ensure that organizations can ramp up faster; scale up speedier. And not at the cost of the proverbial many arms and many legs.
For instance, one session talked about how a Banking Client rolled out an innovative Zero Branch Bank in Europe. Oracle is helping them put this together. All touchpoints are automated. Ofcourse. Not just that. The application is a Hosted Solution model. Rather than investing in infrastructure to be deployed over many months and years, this will ensure rollout in a fraction of that time.
The learnings from this Live example ?? - Even if times are bleak, innovative solutions are always going to invite discretionary spending by organizations.

In the midst of the talks of the ominous dark clouds of Doom & Gloom ( D&G), there were also optimism being brought about by the clouds of another kind - CLOUD COMPUTING. The most recent and glaringly outstanding examples of how an existing proposition has been successfully remodeled and presented to the world is of how CLOUD COMPUTING has enabled the runaway success of AMAZON and FACEBOOK. The former utilized Cloud Computing as a Development Platform while Facebook used it for a Distribution Platform. This enabled both these business ideas to ramp up into global entities pronto. And ofcourse, the cost savings on doing it all in this manner instead of an on-premise-model : have been huge too.
Given the very nature of the beast called CLOUD COMPUTING, it would not be foolhardy to expect that the next big blockbuster business hits aka YAHOO or FACEBOOK can be from the garages or streetcorners of Hyderabad or Mumbai or Delhi.

The NILF also had a heady mix of celebrated and eloquent academicians. This lot expectedly stated their perspective take, without mincing many words. Professor Pankaj Ghemawat, who has already made his mark as a noted academician who redefines norms did the same during his session. He highlighted the need for focusing on the Key metric of Revenue per Employee. Seems obviously simple ? Inspite of this, this key metric has remained flat for most Indian IT companies over the last 4-5 years.
Having said that, the intention should not be to cut costs needlessly or retrench benches but to work towards shoring up efficiencies.
Some To Dos ( This is not intended an exhaustive Dhobi List) :
• No Needless Buyouts
• No carte blanche reduction in headcount
• Reshape. Don’t just retrench
• LIFO approach in retrench to be avoided
• No moratorium on training and development
In short, As the pithy saying goes – Life is and has always been all about the KISS.
KISS aka KEEP IT SIMPLE STUPID.

HA HA - THIS WAS A TEST TO PACKAGE A SEEMINGLY BORING ARTICLE UNDER A TEASINGLY ATTRACTIVE TITLE....